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A recent article in The Sunday Times listed some reasons why and circumstances under which it is actually advisable to splurge on yourself. It was an interesting little read, but I can’t say I agreed with every idea that the piece put forth. For instance, the following made me balk:

Spend big at sample sales and outlet stores. Your inner accountant loves a bargain.

YIKES. The still-flailing addict, fresh from her 6-month shopping ban, nearly choked on her soup when she read this. I mean, I engage in retail therapy, and actually do condone it under some circumstances. I love a bargain more than is truly healthy. And I have spent many a happy birthday trolling the outlet mall, collecting heaps of cheapish goodies to take home with me. But even I know that this is pretty terrible advice.

OK, all right, I realize that this article is talking about splurging: The act of spending a chunk on something that is pure fun for the sake of rewarding yourself. And since sample sales and outlet stores are where we shop when we want to spend willy-nilly, when we have money to burn and no real wishlist, I suppose that follows. But it still makes my blood run cold to think of telling someone to go hog wild at the outlets in this economy. Or really, under any circumstances.

Because I’ve just about decided that sales are a forbidding frenemy. We adore them, because they grant us access to items we can’t afford at full price. But we abhor them for tricking us into purchasing things that don’t quite fit, or don’t really suit, or are identical to things we already have, or aren’t even CLOSE to what we need. We buy these unnecessary, ill-suited items simply because their prices were too good to pass up. Sales summon up our frugality and our greed simultaneously, pit our desire to have something applicable and specific against our desire to have something fun for less than it’s worth. Sales and outlet malls are dangerous to all but the most disciplined and focused of shoppers.

And I am about as focused as a cotton ball when presented with a fantastic sale spread. So there are two things that I try to keep in mind when I am faced with my frenemy:

1. The Full Price Test: You’ve heard this one, I’m sure. Look at the item, look at the price, and ask yourself, “Would I pay full price for this?” If yes, why didn’t you purchase it when it WAS full price? If no, why are you considering buying it now?

2. Eliminating Urgency: This is a Husband Mike trick, bless his wily soul. Look at the item, look at the price, and say to yourself, “This is not the last good deal in the world.” It can be tough to implement this one if you’re considering a limited edition, since other deals will surface but other versions of that specific item may not. But if you’re just trolling for a bargain, any bargain, the one that’s sitting in your lap right now is not the last one that will ever cozy up to yas.

I try my best to use one or both of these little mental tests when I am pondering an impulse sale purchase. Even still, I often cave. Presented with the opportunity to get something pretty for a piddly price, I am frequently too weak to reason my way out of purchasing.

So I’ve started to steer clear. I don’t even GO to Banana Republic when they’re having a massive sale unless I’ve got extra pocket money … because the act of entering the store leads to the act of purchasing something that I love but don’t need and cannot afford.

Sales are undeniably fun, and if wrangled carefully they can be extremely useful tools for the savvy shopper. But the bargain mentality can mess with your willpower, and unless you’re happily flush, that’s just plain BAD. I have a love-hate relationship with them myself, and am not sure I’ll ever be able to use them without getting used right back.

Do you struggle to remain financially reasonable at sales? How do you keep your spending in check? How about outlet malls? Can you go there for something specific, buy it, and go home?

Image courtesy the Justified Sinner.

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I have kept a shopping wishlist for years. After all, I am a Capricorn who enjoys orderliness, organization, and lists of all types. It gives me great pleasure to stumble upon gorgeous dresses and perfect sandals and chunky necklaces, and tuck them all away into a Word document on my home computer for leisurely drool-sessions at later dates.

But in the final weeks of my shopping ban, my wishlist began wreaking havoc on my self-control. It took on a life of its own, and went from soothing-tool-for-preplanned-purchasing to anxiety-producing-procurement-list.

Supply and demand have always monkeyed with my shopping habits. Nothing drives me more insane than falling in love with an item, saving patiently until I have enough to purchase it, and finding it sold out. This pattern of anticipation and disappointment has made me a compulsive checker. If I am planning to purchase something that I know may sell out, I have a hard time quieting my anxiety until I’ve secured it. So I check online every few days to make sure it’s still there, still in my size, and not yet on sale for less than I’m planning to pay.

As the ban end drew near, my wishlist began to grow. Exponentially. The light at the end of the tunnel prompted me to pre-shop for items I would FINALLY be able to purchase, guilt-free, once the fated day arrived.* But those items weren’t generalities like “brown belt” or “leopard-print cardi” … they were specifics like Boden Fun Skirt and Kork-ease metallic platforms and Anthro Jahoda corset top. These were not basics that could be thrifted. They were current-season products that might be gone by the time I was allowed to purchase them.

And MAN did that make me anxious. I was eager to shop freely again, and would have money to do so … but I had inadvertently trapped myself into being excited to buy things that I might not be able to procure.

All this led to my recent shoe transgression, a situation that would never have arisen had I not earmarked those sandals and checked on them compulsively. They would’ve passed me by, and I likely would’ve shifted my focus to something new. Instead, I bought them and knowingly broke my agreement with myself.

I don’t think I could stop keeping a wishlist even if I wanted to. More than half of what goes onto that list never gets bought, and under normal circumstances it really does make me happy just to dream about purchasing them all. But in the past month, I’ve felt the dangers of wishlist maintenance. Keeping tabs on items that are within my financial means can generate undue anxiety. After all, I need nothing; These items truly represent wishes, and any anxiety I may feel over their procurement is wholly fabricated. But that doesn’t mean it feels any less real or drives me any less batso.

Do you keep a wishlist? Does it contain only items that you might actually afford, only items you could NEVER afford, or a mixture of both? Does it help you stay on track financially or does it meddle with your self-control? How often do you check up on your earmarked items? What do you do if they sell out?

*That day is today, as a matter of fact. My ban posts are running about two weeks behind real-time!

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