Some of you may wear actual, formal uniforms for work or school, but the uniform I’m thinking of here has a bit more leeway. We’ve all got certain combinations of garments that form the foundations of our dressing practices. In winter, I do long cardigan, tunic, leggings, and boots many days of the week. In summer, dress and pumps.
What are your uniforms? Why do they work? Is it important to you to vary what you wear and avoid your uniform at times? If so, why? If not, why not?
{ 46 comments }
Reader Pamela e-mailed me this question:
I’m fairly successful at putting together composed outfits in the fall and winter, when I can utilize several layers. In the warmer months, (and I live in Tennessee, so the warmer months make up the majority of my year), I have much more trouble. I’d love some advice on how to utilize layers in the warmer months. What sort of layers can I use? Should I be incorporating light scarves and vests, or just layering short sleeve pieces? What basic pieces should I have?
A while back, I offered up some options for covered-up warm weather looks, but Pamela is looking for more general guidance on summer layering. And I’ll admit that I, too, have a tougher time crafting fun and interesting outfits in the blazing heat when layering becomes uncomfortable. In fact, if it gets hot enough, I look like this:
When the Minnesota summer gets humid, sticky, and unbearably hot, it’s a sleeveless dress and sandals. Period. Anything more makes me an unbearable grouch. But here are a few ideas for days that fall somewhere between “pleasantly warm” and “infuriatingly hot,” when layers are a possibility.
A few summers back, I thrifted up a whole mess of printed, silky, knee-length skirts specifically for layering. It won’t always work, but allowing a fun print to peek out at a dress or skirt hemline is a great way to add interest to a summer outfit without adding too much bulk.
Long cardigans hold virtually no appeal in hot weather, and sometimes traditional ones seem equally unsavory. But cropped cardigans and boleros can add interest to a summery frock without bogging you down. This short-sleeved version is ideal for truly hot weather, but 3/4 and long sleeves are typically bearable in all but the hottest weather.
A more daring option, to be sure, but worth exploring. Especially if you’re desperate for an option other than tee + shorts + sandals. Lightweight wraps can be draped and tied in many ways that add interest to your upper torso, and ponchos can be worn over spaghetti strap tank tops and no one will be the wiser. (If you go the poncho route, steer clear of heavy, tasseled wool, of course.)
This was a day when it was so hot and humid, the camera lens refused to remain fog-free for more than a few moments. So it was sleeveless dress and sandals … though I grudgingly added a long, lightweight, PRINTED scarf. I believe that printed scarves are ideal for summer wear since so many of us rely on solids for our actual clothing, and a vibrant print goes a long way toward spicing up an otherwise plain ensemble.
Sometimes adding more cloth to an outfit tips it out of balance. Other times it’s too darned hot. So consider counting your accessories as layers. A necklace, belt, and bangles can add all the additional interest necessary to elevate a simple summer outfit. Don’t kill yourself over layering if you just can’t hack it.
How do you incorporate layers during the warm months of the year?
{ 20 comments }
Today’s guest post comes from fellow Minnesotan and blogger Shannon Hyland-Tassava! Shannon’s blog, Mama in Wonderland, is a fun read and a great resource for moms. Since she’s a stylish gal to boot, I asked Shannon to suggest a few easy outfits for moms on the go. Read on to find out more!
* * * * *
When Sally recently offered me the opportunity to write a guest post about stylish, go-to outfit “formulas” for busy moms, I jumped at the chance. Many people think that “mom style” is an oxymoron. What kind of “style” works for a daily life filled with the nonstop, hands-on work of caring for children—let alone the endless laundry, cooking, and cleaning of many a busy mom’s schedule?
Well, but wait. As a busy mom myself, I believe that we moms can do better than yoga pants, ill-fitting jeans, faded tees, and workout wear as everyday wear. I believe this so strongly that I devoted an entire section of my book
My guiding principles for pieces that work for a busy mom’s wardrobe are that clothes need to be easy, washable, practical, and comfortable. Keeping that in mind, here are a few go-to looks for the stylish, active mom. I think you’ll see that “mom style” is NOT an oxymoron, but instead it’s often downright drool-worthy. (No pun intended, moms of babies!)
Image via Polyvore
This is my most frequent and beloved mom “uniform.” Striped tops are more popular than ever this year but are also perennially in style, and can be found at every price point, so update your regular jeans-and-tee look with a classic sailor tee that you’ll wear for years to come. I tend to go for cute flats (think: leopard-print ballets, patent driving mocs in a fun color) rather than flip-flops—more practical for running around town (or after toddlers)—but the idea is the same. Note the use of vibrant accessories to punch up a very casual, basic everyday look, and the large, luxe-looking bag that elevates any outfit to hip-mama status yet still accommodates diapers, extra toddler clothes, sippy cups, toy cars, snacks, and the like. (Target has some inexpensive similar bags right now.)
Here’s the fall version of my favorite mom look: similar, but with skinny jeans tucked into tall boots and a jacket thrown on top. So stylish, yet as basic as can be.
Image via The Daybook
Image via Target.com
Listen, moms, don’t save dresses for special occasions! A washable, knit dress is the ultimate in easy dressing: throw it over your head, add shoes and a bag (and perhaps a cardigan if it’s chilly) and you’re done. Stick with a knee-length or just-above-the-knee hemline and a shape that’s both comfy and flattering; for most moms, that’s something slightly A-line, perhaps with a wrap top. Experiment! A dress is just as easy and comfortable as yoga pants and a tee—but it’ll make you look stylish and put-together at school pick-up even if you’ve been up all night with the baby and haven’t showered in two…oops, make that three…days. Try a casual dress with ballet flats in spring, sandals in the summer, and tall riding boots in the fall. If you add a cardigan, keep it lightweight and fitted for the sleekest, most polished look.
Image via J.Jill
Another fun look for warmer weather is a casual skirt in place of your usual shorts or yoga capris. Again: just as easy as those less-polished pieces, but much more stylish and grown-up. Go for knee length, and consider chino, lightweight denim, or cotton twill fabrics for just the right combination of structure and comfort. Pair your skirts with basic tees, ruffly tanks, button-front shirts, cardigans—anything you’d normally wear on top with shorts or jeans. To keep the look “busy-mom-casual” rather than overdressed, add cute and practical skimmers, driving mocs, comfy sandals, or ballet flats. In the fall, try boots instead of flats for a little more warmth and coverage.
I can attest that the above “stylish mom looks” are all completely doable; on any given day, you’re likely to find me in one of the three, even when I’m taking my kiddos to the playground or spending all day cleaning the house and planning playdates. When one of my friends confided that her husband had called me “the best-dressed mom at preschool drop-off,” I knew I was doing something right. And all I’d really done was swap out sloppy sweats for a few simple dresses and a scarf or two here and there. You can, too—you stylish mom, you.
*** Shannon Hyland-Tassava is a college-town writer, blogger, and busy mom. Her first book – The Essential Stay-at-Home Mom Manual: How to Have a Wondrous Life Amidst Kids and Chaos
**Disclosure: Actions you take from the hyperlinks within this blog post may yield commissions for alreadypretty.com. See Already Pretty’s disclosure statement for more details.
{ 19 comments }
Assets are relative, ya know? Each woman gets to decide for herself which aspects of her figure she’d like to highlight and play up, regardless of what various magazines may say. And, remarkably, there are some simple techniques for drawing attention to your bodily assets that work regardless of what those assets may be! If you’d like the observing world to take note of a specific feature, try:
Whether you generate contrast by pairing colors with drastically different values, or adding a splash of color in an otherwise neutral ensemble, the place of contrast will become a point of interest. If you want to highlight your waist, make sure there’s high contrast at your waistline. If you want to highlight your legs, try wearing a black dress and shoes with hot pink tights. Color contrast is a fantastic way to play up a cherished asset.
Sequins, embroidery, beading, even an inset of pattern or texture can serve as embellishment on a garment. And wherever that embellishment goes, so goes the eye. If you’d like to highlight your derrière, go for jeans with flap or embroidered pockets. To draw attention to your shoulders, pick jacket with epaulets. Embellish those assets, my friends!
Naturally, you’ll want to temper this one with your own modesty preferences and knowledge of social mores. But baring skin is a classic technique for asset highlighting. Should you wish to play up your rear end or thighs, you may need to see another method. (At least if you’re going out in public.) But most other figure bits can be intentionally exposed under the right circumstances. If you want to highlight your arms, wear a scarf with a sleeveless maxi dress so your arms take center stage. If you want to highlight your legs, wear them bare with an above-the-knee skirt.
Since nothing is universal or foolproof, these techniques won’t work across the board. It’s tough to do contrast at the bust line or embellishment at the ankles. But all three of these work across a huge variety of scenarios, highlighting assets as they go.
Do you use any of these techniques to play up your assets? Which ones, and for which amazing assets?
{ 10 comments }
I consider myself to be a confirmed sartorial dabbler. There are definite constants within my personal style, but I refuse to be tied down to a single aesthetic. Which is why folks who have actively chosen to dress within a narrow set of parameters fascinate me. I thought it would be interesting to call upon a few such women and ask them to share their motivations and choices. So I reached out to Alicia of Sea of Ghosts, Casey of Elegant Musings, and Trystan of This is CorpGoth. And they were kind enough to oblige me! Read on to find out more about their wardrobes, their decision-making processes, and their lives within defined dressing aesthetics.
* * * * *
What made you decide to dedicate your wardrobe to a single, defined aesthetic?
A series of events in my life made me realise that I wasn’t representing who I felt I was on the inside with the things I adorned myself with on the outside, and I really resented that conscious dissociation. I wanted someone to understand fundamental things about me from across a room, and as an artist, I wanted to present myself with a level of visual integrity true to my work. They say that you should dress for the person you want to be and that mentality helped me take my wardrobe from defined to refined.
How long have you stuck to it?
It took about a year and half of consciously documenting and analysing what I was wearing before I managed to get to that point where I knew how I wanted to define my aesthetic, and I would say it’s only really been refined since October of last year. It feels like longer though when you finally find an aesthetic that feels like home.
What do you love about it?
Well I have this fanaticism about feeling like myself. It’s not just the clothes; it extends to my jewellery and even my perfume. So I definitely love that what I project externally is 100% me. I always feel comfortable. I also never feel like “I have nothing to wear” even though I don’t have a large collection of clothes because this kind of dark minimalism has an innate mystique. It’s not an ostentatious look, so I wear and re-wear ensembles with ease—when all your dresses are black with asymmetrical draping it’s harder for others to tell them apart.
What’s frustrating?
The cost. As I refined, I found an affinity with high-end European designers such as Ann Demuelemeester and Rick Owens doing this dark, moody aesthetic that was definitely “who I wanted to be.” So, you know, I can’t really afford to embrace that all the time – which is really where the root of my minimalism comes in. As a style I love the juxtaposition of aesthetic minimalism with the avant garde – but for me it’s also minimalism as a practise, because I have to work with a very small collection of garments if I want to dress this way – I just can’t afford to have an overflowing wardrobe.
What would you say to someone considering a similar sartorial path?
Some people are comfortable and some people are restless. Restless people will never be able to stick to a single aesthetic because it would become stifling. So if you think you have the capacity to stick to one aesthetic, the key to identifying it is to understand yourself. You shouldn’t embrace an aesthetic that doesn’t reflect who you are because you’ll never be truly comfortable and spend all your money buying clothes for someone else. Do whatever it takes. For me it was rooted in my tastes in music, mostly, as well the kind of art and design I prefer. I wanted to lose myself in the darkness of both of those things. If it helps, find other people with similar interests and see how they’re dressing. When you’re comfortable there’s no need to change – just evolve. Evolution is vital to self expression. If you’re a naturally comfortable person, once you find your aesthetic it’s easy to stick to it.
What made you decide to dedicate your wardrobe to a single, defined aesthetic?
I think I’ve always been in love with the idea of glamor, vintage clothing, and history in a tangible sense. I grew up watching classic films from the 30s through the 50s, so the aesthetics of those eras rubbed off on me. I started to realize as a young adult that I felt more comfortable dressed up with a nod towards the glamorous women who were such style icons of the past, and adopting a very “put together” look. I also felt really out of step with the current trends, and always have to a degree. So striking out on my own seemed natural, and it just slowly but surely became a more specific look the more I researched and added to my vintage collection.
How long have you stuck to it?
I would say I have been dressing in a more dedicated vintage manner for the past 4+ years. But I was dabbling in a mid-century aesthetic since I was in my mid teens—so over ten years. It’s been something that has slowly happened over time—I didn’t just wake up one morning and decide to chuck all my modern clothes for vintage style pieces! It’s definitely taken the better part of 5 years of honest dedication to build up a wardrobe I can finally say reflects my aesthetic.
What do you love about it?
The fun of playing dress-up daily! I think I never grew out of that as a child, and the idea of using clothes to not only give others an idea of my personality but mood appeals to me. Clothes are “silent communicators,” and more often than not (right or wrong), people do get a sense of who you are based on what you are wearing. I’m a bit shy at times, so I let my clothes do the talking for me in certain situations. They are great conversation starters, which helps me break the ice when I’m at social events and am a bit unsure of how to proceed.
Another aspect of vintage dressing that I love is the thrill of the hunt. Because so many of my clothes are genuine vintage or thrifted pieces (many of which I refashion to conform to my chosen look), I never know when the “next big find” will turn up! It keeps things interesting since I can’t just walk into a retail store and find exactly what I’m looking for. I have to use a big of ingenuity and digging.
What’s frustrating?
There are very few in my city who dress vintage, so it tends to draw a lot of attention to me. While I’m a fairly confident person when it comes to dressing in a way that stands out, I don’t always like the attention, especially when it becomes hostile or personally invasive. Strangers seem to think it’s okay if they touch my clothes or say things that would normally be socially inappropriate. I also find that others often just don’t understand why someone would choose to dress differently than the mainstream. Explaining in always tough, but I usually just say “it makes me happy” and then leave it. I still have people trying to convince me that I shouldn’t dress like my grandmothers did in the 1940s and it’s not attractive to men. I always laugh at the last statement, because judging by the number of times I’ve been asked out or for my phone number, I don’t think it’s considered unattractive in the least! (And my husband rather likes how I dress too!)
What would you say to someone considering a similar sartorial path?
Be bold! Wearing vintage style clothes takes a certain level of confidence and willingness to overlook all the stares and questions. You just have to stop paying attention to what others think. Experiment and find the decade(s) you like the best, and spend time studying the looks and tailoring it to your lifestyle and personal sense of style! I don’t follow a “strict” vintage manner of dressing, but everyone has to decide how specific or not they wish to be. I think a lot of those interested in vintage are a bit intimidated by the amount of work it seems to require on a daily basis. Believe me, my getting ready time doesn’t take that long now that I’ve done it for so long (like any routine it becomes habit after awhile!). I also have friends who are “weekend vintage dressers” and opt to wait until they don’t have to worry about workwear to don their favorite vintage pieces. There is no “right” way to wear vintage, in my opinion, and that’s the beauty of it!
What made you decide to dedicate your wardrobe to a single, defined aesthetic?
The joke about goths is that we wear black on the outside because we feel black on the inside. But it’s just a joke. We’re not necessarily depressed, nor are we evil or Satanic or anything else (check out my friend Jillian Venters’ excellent video answer to “What is goth?“). Mostly, I wear dark colors because I find them lovely, elegant, delightful, decadent, and far more attractive on me than pastels or brights.
And I’ve always been drawn to a darkly beautiful, fantastical aesthetic, with a liberal dash of history. I’ve researched and sewn historical costumes all my life, and I’ve acted at renaissance faires since college (even met my husband working at one!). I studied Victorian novels in grad school. I love traveling to crumbling castles and cemeteries. All of this informs my stylistic sense.
How long have you stuck to it?
As a teenager, I discovered thrift stores and realized I didn’t have to wear the same stuff my peers did. I created outfits inspired by my fantasies and the ’80s new wave/gothic/punk music I loved. In college, I further refined my style to emphasize the gothic side with elements of Victoriana. It helped that I worked at a secondhand clothing store for a while. I shaved half my head, dyed pink streaks in my hair, decorated my motorcycle jacket, and generally had a ton of fun with my style. I was even in a sorority, and my sisters were OK having a goth in their midst.
However, at my first job after college, I thought I had to abandon my true self and become a corporate drone. That made me miserable! I eventually went to grad school, returned to my sartorial self, and discovered a career that let me express myself in my work and be myself at the office. I’m now 43, and have been dressing in some sort of gothic fashion ever since.
What do you love about it?
You can usually find a black or dark-colored garment at any store! I bought a black velvet miniskirt at J.Jill. I got a black crochet trumpet skirt at Coldwater Creek. Most of my wardrobe comes from Target, Old Navy, Macy’s, Chadwicks, and Newport News. I can quickly skim through any store, online or off, and pick out the possible items I’m interested in. This really streamlines my shopping.
What’s frustrating?
Summer! Direct sunlight and hot weather are every goth’s nemeses. I prefer to wear black tights every day, but that would be dumb even in Northern California’s mild summers. Finding black sandals is the bane of my existence every spring, especially work-appropriate sandals (and walking-friendly, work-appropriate black sandals? that’s my holy grail). I get so sick of wearing the same few hot-weather outfits all summer long.
What would you say to someone considering a similar sartorial path?
“To thine own self be true.” — Shakespeare. Your style should reflect who you are, while also being appropriate to what you do. That’s why I started my blog. I believe you can express a unique, unusual, alternative style and still be considered a professional in the work world. I regularly speak at conferences and teach classes on behalf of my employer, all while dressing like the essential me, not like some cliché of a corporate worker. Wearing clothes that suit your inner self gives you more confidence, which will help you succeed at whatever you do.
* * * * *
How many of you dress within defined aesthetics? What are your parameters? How does this influence your sartorial choices? What guided your decisions?
{ 28 comments }
Lisa requested a post on my most-worn thrifted items and examples of how they’ve been remixed. How could I say no to THAT one? I scoured the archives looking for my most-worn, bought-used garments, and here are the winners:
This little jacket has been through several years with me and gets year-round wear. It has a tendency to look a bit rumpled and sometimes I have to fight to keep those pocket flaps down, but the nipped-in waist and versatile vibe have made it a longtime favorite. I believe I paid about $5 for this jacket.
This sucker has gotten far more than these six wears since its purchase, believe me. I’m fascinated to see, though, that for blog purposes I have paired it with full skirts three times and maxis twice. Huh. This shirt cost me about $4.
This shirt has certainly been worn and styled in a wide variety of ways. Something about its Western roots make me want to pair it with boots, it seems. I paid about $2 for this shirt.
Hmmm, come to think of it, this was an eBay purchase. It was used when I bought it and only set me back $9.99, but I suppose it wasn’t technically “thrifted.” Is that cheating? Do you consider bought-used eBay items to be “thrifted”?
OK, this skirt isn’t a staple. No way, no how. Every other garment featured here gets fairly regular wear both on and off the blog. But I was dumbfounded to discover that this skirt had been photographed five times in the past year and a half since its purchase. I can honestly say that I expected it to get trotted out less than once per year. I paid $18 for it. Pricey for thrift, but well worth it.
A few other items that deserve a tip of the hat include the black boat neck tee that I wore until it had several holes in it that could no longer be mended (it’s since been replaced by two bought-new black boat necks), the maroon scoopneck sweater that I thrifted this fall and must’ve worn far more times than I photographed, and the pleated khaki skirt that I bought on a whim and still adore three years later. Aside from the pink skirt, all of these thrifted wardrobe staples are pretty basic: Lots of denim, simple shapes, classic cuts, versatile colors. Makes sense as most frequently worn garments become favorites due to versatility.
Are any of YOUR wardrobe staples thrifted? What are they?
{ 28 comments }
Becky dropped this into the Suggestion Box:
I found your discussion of ponte very useful and I’m wondering what other fibers you seek out and/or avoid. For example, I’ve noticed that many brands label certain rayon blends as machine washable but said garments quickly fade and pill, even on the delicate cycle. I’ve learned the hard way to avoid buying them. On the other hand, I’ve noticed that some (usually natural) fibers/fabrics that are labeled “dry clean only” actually hold up well to machine washing on the delicate cycle (and air drying). … Do you have any fiber-related rules of thumb that you follow when selecting clothes?
Fibers are surprisingly personal, I’ve found. With sensitivities, allergies, budgetary concerns, and upkeep all playing into fiber choices, we’ve all got our own favorites and nemeses. My favorite fibers depend heavily on which area of my body I’m clothing, so I’ll break it down for yas:
Silk: As I’ve said approximately 23 trillion times, silk is a magical fiber that will keep you warm in winter and cool in summer. People tell me it comes from silkworms, but I’m inclined to believe that it comes from A MAGICAL FAIRYLAND. My house is old and drafty, but even on finger-freezingly cold days, winding a silk scarf around my neck warms me instantly. Silk is my ideal scarf fiber because it is a 4-season option: Silk scarves in summer feel weightless and breezy, look effortless and chic.
Cashmere: I’m cold most of the time, but I DO refrain from wearing my cashmere scarves in August. However, this fiber is second only to silk in warming properties and just as soft. It’s got more loft, too, if you’d prefer something weighty or bulky for proportional reasons. I vastly prefer sweater-knit cashmere scarves, as they feel softer against the skin and trap body heat more effectively.
Cotton: I sweat constantly and hate dry cleaning. Therefore flattering, versatile cotton tops are my Holy Top Grails. I am most comfortable in cotton because I can wear it without worry: If I pit out my top, it’ll just get thrown into the laundry. If I spill something on it, I can glob some Palmolive onto it, wait a few days, and wash. Cotton with a hit of spandex can look a bit more sleek and polished than 100%, so blends work, too.
Merino wool: This fiber comes in a distant second. Very distant, in fact. But if I’m considering a non-cotton option, I gravitate toward the graceful drape and soft knit of Merino in cardigans and pullovers alike. It’s definitely warm, but in thinner weaves can work year-round, especially if you work in Icebox Office conditions during the summer.
Stretch twill: Every office job I ever held had a “business casual” dress code, so I never had to invest in lined wool or drapey crepe dress pants. And that means I’ve been faithful to stretch twill since my early twenties. It’s just polished enough to work in most office environments, but just casual enough to transition beautifully to weekend wear.
Ponte: Well, I’ve got a whole love letter to ponte written right here! At this point in my style evolution, the majority of my pants are slim-fitting, and my ponte pairs are stretchy and comfortable yet still look more structured and polished than regular leggings.
Wool blends: My favorite skirt in the whole wide world is a wool blend Banana Republic full skirt, and I wear it year-round. Skirts are, by nature, extremely well ventilated so wool can be done in all but the hottest, most humid weather. And I’ve found that smooth-knit wool blends are durable, heavy, relatively wrinkle resistant, and work well in both formal and casual contexts. Of course “smooth-knit” is essential: Thick, fluffy wool weaves will look a bit odd on a hot July weekend.
Stretch twill: Again, it’s just a great option for bottoms! Although I seek out fabulous wool skirts, I end up buying more stretch twill skirts since they are more popular and widely available. I’ve got full, pencil, and A-line versions that all remain in rotation throughout the year.
Polyester: Oh, I know. But I’m just being honest. Polyester/spandex blends are comfortable, drape beautifully, refuse to wrinkle even at gunpoint, and are eternally washable. Vintage polyester seems to have more stink-retaining properties than the stuff you’ll find on the racks at Target.
Cotton blends: Straight-up cotton dresses seldom work for me. Voile is such a lovely idea, but in practice it wads, wrinkles, and attracts absolutely appalling amounts of lint. Cotton blends, however, seem to be less linty. Most of my dresses are cotton/spandex blends, but cotton mixes well with silk, linen, and many other fibers, too. And so long as it remains both absorbent and washable, it’s A-OK by me.
Rayon: Most of my twirly, floaty dresses are crafted from rayon, which has some of the fluidity of silk but is (generally) machine washable. Rayon is generally pretty thin, so this group of dresses is worn in warm weather.
Linen: Unless it’s a linen KNIT, I avoid this fiber altogether. I am too tightly wound to deal with the rumpled look that goes hand in hand with linen. It feels great on my body, but the wrinkling drives me batso.
Silk tops: Unless it’s a silk KNIT, I avoid buying and wearing silk tops. They’ve got the warm in winter/cool in summer thing going on, sure, but they also excel at showing pit stains. I’d feel more self-conscious in a long-sleeved silk blouse than I would in a cotton blend tube top. No lie.
Straight-up wool: I’ve got a few garments, including a sweaterdress purchased in Iceland, and they are marvelously warm. They are also so unbearably itchy that I can hardly sit still. I stick to softer blends and weaves.
Neoprene and similar: I know this may seem a bit “out there,” but scuba-inspired fashion is trending for spring. I kid you not. I’ve ordered a few items from Athleta that turned out to have that spongy, neoprene feeling and they just make my skin crawl.
Becky also had some questions about care instructions, and I am very loathe to generalize since disobeying those cryptic little symbols on the garment tag can lead to disaster. So here’s what I’ll say: Always follow garment care instructions if you have any doubts at all, if a garment is delicate or valuable, or if you cannot risk any shape shifting or damage whatsoever. Just do what the tag says and rest easy.
If you’re willing to experiment a bit and live with potentially ruinous results, the basic rule of thumb is that natural fibers can be hand-washed in cold water and hung/laid flat to dry. This treatment is unlikely to destroy anything cotton, linen, wool, cashmere, silk, rayon, or other plant- or animal-derived material. Most polyester is washable, too, despite care instructions UNLESS it is blended with something exotic, has loads of embellishment, or any other mitigating factors.
And that is my extremely wussy advice on garment care instruction rebellion.
NOW. Let’s talk about your preferences. Get yourself over to the comments and tell us which fiber is your favorite for:
And while you’re at it, share any tips you’ve got for deciphering/ignoring/judging garment care instructions. What are your rules of thumb?
**Disclosure: Actions you take from the hyperlinks within this blog post may yield commissions for alreadypretty.com. See Already Pretty’s disclosure statement for more details.
{ 46 comments }
Clothing Commentary
by Sal on April 30, 2012 · 37 comments
Oh, how I love this skirt. It’s romantic yet funky, playful yet sophisticated, and ever so fun to wear. It’s also, in essence, a grown-up version of a tutu. And whenever I wore it to the office, whenever I wear it now, it draws lots of comments. Lots of curiosity. It’s an attention-grabber, and causes people to come out of the woodwork to share their thoughts.
And no one has ever said anything nasty about it. Not directly to me, anyway. And I’m able to field whatever questions and opinons get thrown at me, no problem. But I’ve had years of practice and given it loads of thought. And at our Strong, Sexy & Stylish events, several attendees have mentioned that they love the idea of dressing smartly and stylishly, but worry about how peers will react. Specifically how often peers may comment upon or question any noticeable changes in personal style. So I thought I’d offer up a few suggestions for dealing with clothing and style commentary from your peer group.
Mentally prepare
If you’ve gone barefaced for 15 years and suddenly start wearing full makeup every day, people will likely notice and comment. If you’ve worn jeans or pants for ages and start bringing skirts and dresses into the mix, you might get a few questions. One reason why these inquiries feel difficult to handle is that they surprise us. Just knowing that your changes may prompt a few curious questions can help you feel more prepared to react and respond.
Role play
If you’re very anxious about how you might handle potential comments and questions, have a friend or loved one do some role playing with you. You can probably imagine most of the stuff that’ll come at you: “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in slacks, Jane!” “Wow, new hair. Big change.” “You look so different!” “So dressed up. Going for an interview, or something?” Jot them down, and do a quick dialogue. You’ll be amazed by how this exercise will prime your mental/emotional pump for the real deal.
Have short and long responses
Even if the role playing thing seems a bit too in-depth, consider mapping out some potential replies to questions and comments. Different questions require different levels of response. You needn’t launch into your personal style journey or decision-making process that led you to switch from heels to flats or long hair to short. Not with everyone. ”Wow, new hair. Big change,” can get a simple, “Yeah, it is. I’m loving it!” On the other hand, ”So dressed up. Going for an interview, or something?” might necessitate a bit more background. Something like, “Nope, just felt like it was time to mix up my personal style a bit. I’m having such fun with these changes!” Judge for yourself who merits a quick reply and who needs a deeper explanation.*
Give it two weeks
This nugget comes from the ever-wise Husband Mike. Several years ago, he decided to wear suits to his SUPER casual office. Every day. He wanted to make it his personal uniform. And, as you might expect, he got a stream of “job interview” jokes and curious comments. But they lasted for two weeks, then tapered, then stopped completely. Now, this will only help you if you’ve made a relatively drastic change and plan to stick with it consistently from here on out. If you wear the occasional adult tutu, that’s a different deal. But if you get a makeover, switch styles drastically overnight, dye or cut your hair, or do something similarly permanent, count on about two weeks of inquiries. Your peer group should acclimate by then. (Hopefully.)
Stay positive
I try so hard to assume the best about everyone, but I do feel that this kind of question/comment behavior requires some guardedness. If a coworker points out that you’ve changed your appearance and you shrink back in dismay or alarm, you’ve revealed a chink in your armor. If instincts kick in, your coworker may start asking more questions, or teasing, or prodding for more information. You made these changes because you wanted to, because doing so boosted your self-confidence, because you want to look and feel fabulous. Make sure to say so! If a fellow student saunters up to you and says, “Whoa. Why on EARTH are you wearing high heels to class?” say, “Because they make me feel gorgeous!” If your aunt says, “I wish you hadn’t cut off all your beautiful hair,” respond with, “Well, I did. And I think this new ‘do suits me perfectly!”
Of course, if someone is being rude to you, butting into your business, and commenting on your body, appearance, weight, or anything about your physical self, you always have the option to tell them to butt out and eff off. Your body, your business, PERIOD. However, in some ways, you’ll reclaim more of your power by acknowledging their observation, owning it, and putting your own positive spin on it. When a person offers a negative or teasing comment on your appearance, they are likely trying to get a rise out of you. It’s a classic bullying technique. Swearing, silent treatments, and rants can feel awesome. Denying a bully the satisfaction of an outraged or hurt response feels even better, in my experience.
Clothing, grooming, and appearance-related commentary is such a mixed bag. Compliments are like tiny little blessings, and can inspire unexpected joy. Comments and questions can cut both ways, and often make us feel scrutinized, judged, and targeted. But I hope that the possibility of generating curious queries won’t keep you from tweaking, finessing, or even completely changing your style or appearance. With a little bit of knowledge and foresight, you can field those questions with grace and aplomb.
Have you ever been on the receiving end of appearance-related questions or comments that caught you off guard? How did you react? Any quick responses that seem to work across the board? Is your peer group likely to get chatty if you change how you look in any small way? Why do you think that is?
*If anyone. You have no obligation to explain yourself to anyone at all. But in terms of diplomacy, it’s often more beneficial to offer truthful information than withhold everything and let people make their own assumptions.
{ 37 comments }