I will never be skinny
I will never have big boobs
I will never be tall
I will never have a six pack
I will never be able to go out in a high wind and look sexily windblown
I will never give up on fitness
I will never take for granted the fact that I have healthy boobs, small as they may be
I will never underestimate the power of platforms
I will never stop doing crunches and lower back exercises so that my core is strong
I will never forget that people would KILL for my curls
Originally posted 2009-08-25 05:49:00.
A couple of weeks ago, I was on the receiving end of this formulaic and extremely common compliment:
“You’ve lost weight! You look great!”
The giver was a friend I’ve had since age five and one of the most cerebral men I’ve ever known, so I felt perfectly comfortable pushing back. I pointed out that equating lost weight with improved looks is both insulting and assumptive. What if I’d been ill and lost weight because I was too sick to eat? Was he implying that I looked like a horse’s ass when I was heavier? Did he realize that following “you’ve lost weight” with “you look great” is a fantastic way to reinforce the idea that only thin women look good to the observing world?
Originally posted 2014-12-03 06:26:54.
I believe that there are three levels to becoming a stylish woman:
- Learning to love and accept your body, just as it is
- Learning to dress your body in a way that aligns with your personal figure flattery priorities
- Learning to dress your body in a way that expresses your creativity and tastes
Accessing that third level through expressive dressing can help foster self-love and self-respect while simultaneously providing a fun and rewarding creative outlet. But tackling the first two is what makes that third one truly possible. Many of us try to skip to expressing our creativity through personal style, but in my experience, doing so before making serious strides toward self love AND sussing out how you want your style and body to interact often leads to frustration, confusion, and backtracking.
Originally posted 2011-01-20 06:23:27.