Monthly Archives: March 2014

Your Style, Your Call

so not interested in your judgment

A few weeks ago, a lovely reader reached out to me over e-mail. She said many kind and supportive things, but one stood out in my mind and is still rattling around in there. She’d just finished my book, and said she was so grateful that I hadn’t forced her to donate the contents of her closet or make drastic changes to her dressing behaviors. She loves neutrals and muted colors, and had been toting around an inferiority complex for AGES, convinced that her disinterest in bold, bright colors constituted a shortcoming. It was such a relief to her to read that she could wear those neutrals and muted colors forever if she wanted. I was thrilled to hear that my book had been helpful to her on her personal style journey, but also dismayed to hear that she’d felt pressured to dress in ways that didn’t resonate with her personally.

We’ve talked about fashion and permission before, but allow me to repeat myself: Most style rules give you permission to wear some things and forbid you to wear others based on your shape, size, age, and other factors. But you should feel free to ignore those rules and make up your own. You will always feel best about your body and self if you dress in ways that make you happy. And that means you will always look your best if you dress in ways that make you happy, because happiness radiates outward. For some of you, that will mean abiding existing rules about figure flattery, proportion, color, scale, and such. For some of you, that will mean picking which rules to follow and which ones to bend or break. For some of you, that will mean pretending there are no “rules” at all. Ever.

DON’T wear color if you don’t want to. DON’T wear fitted clothes if you don’t want to. DON’T worry about “stumpy” legs or a balanced silhouette or elongating your neck if you don’t want to. You are the boss. You make the calls. Wearing clothing that aligns with your personality and aesthetic preferences and inner desires might not give you a socially sanctioned set of curves or proportions that align with the current beauty ideal. But wearing clothing that resonates with you as a unique individual will help you feel centered, confident, powerful, and real. And that has value.

Follow the rules that work for you, discard the others. And never let anyone convince you that you’re doing it wrong. There is no one right way to be stylish.

Image source

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Let’s talk Style Secrets!

Weesha outfit Forever 21 Plus scuba dress, Next animal print blazer, h & m jewellery, River Island white pumps, Michael Kors watchWeesha outfit h & m jewellery, River Island white pumps, Michael Kors watch

Dress- Forever 21 Plus (more colour options online)

Blazer- thrifted

Necklace- Bershka

Ring- h & m (old)

Shoes- River Island (out of stock) similar

Bag and watch- Michael Kors at Nordstrom

 I thought it might be cool to share my style basics with you today, they’re just certain ideas that help me feel stylish and put together. Apart from making it easy to dress up basics, these pieces/ rules save a lot of valuable minutes when I’m getting ready in the morning. I’m not sure how helpful this is going to be, it might be stuff you’ve heard of already but here goes!

1) I think layering with a blazer is the easiest way to make any outfit stylish. The blazer I’m wearing in this post has a bold print in a neutral shade, the length is versatile enough for dresses or jeans, and it fits perfectly around my arms so I can move about easily. I absolutely love blazers in bold colours and prints, and when I need a neutral option, I skip the black blazer for greys, creams or navy.

2) This rule could possibly be something engrained by my mom, but I can’t leave the house unless I’m wearing at least two jewellery pieces- a statement necklace and a watch. I love bold, chunky statement necklaces because they draw attention to my face and my watch is just something that makes me feel stylish even if I’m wearing flip flops and shorts.

3) I only buy shoes that make me shoe-gasm, they don’t have to be high heels as long as they make me feel awesome. If I’m second guessing a shoe purchase, I walk away because it failed the shoe-gasm test. I am currently obsessed with kitten heels and ankle boots because they are a great way to stay comfortable and look dressed up.

4) Investing in a neutral bag really does pay off. I get the most wear out of my black cross body bag and beige handbag because they go with everything so I always end up reaching for them. They still haven’t shown any signs of wear and tear, and I’m less tempted to buy more handbags because I find it unnecessary. Of course, this depends on your budget, you don’t need a designer bag. High street stores have great options, and even though I saved up and bought my bags as birthday and Christmas gifts, both were from Nordstrom sales.

5) So this last rule is something I learnt from Justin on Ugly Betty ( I still miss that show!), but when ever I’m layering on more accessories than usual and I’m second guessing my choices, I follow the advice of Coco Chanel and remove one accessory before I walk out the door. This doesn’t have to be an everyday rule, it’s obviously your preference but I find it helpful for whenever I’m in a hurry and I’m all flustered about over-styling.

Again, these tips are just my opinion and they might not suit everyone’s taste. The most important rule would definitely be confidence and self expression.

I would love to know your style secrets or rules, and while we’re on the subject, if you could get the scoop on a celebrity’s style secrets, who would you choose? I  personally need to know the secret to Solange Knowles effortless pattern clashing!

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Inspired Outfit: Graphic Prints and Black

Nashelly of the blog Fabulatina has created a marvelous mix of graphic prints and stark black in this striking outfit. Also love how she’s utilized matte and shiny blacks to create depth, and studded accents for a hint of toughness. Check her original post for details about this inspired outfit!

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