Over the years, it seems that Halloween has become increasingly sexual when it comes to women’s costumes. In addition to selling some rather skimpy pre-made costumes for very young girls, many online and brick-and-mortar costume shops have begun offering “sexy” versions of traditional costumes: Sexy pirate, sexy witch, sexy professor, etc.
Why do you think “sexy” Halloween costumes for women have become the norm? Women have been objectified for ages, but this is a fairly recent trend. What changed? Do you think this is just a blip and that a wider variety of sexy and non-sexy costume options will be available eventually?
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{ 77 comments… read them below or add one }
My best guess is that it stems from college party culture. Many women in college dress sexually for parties in short skirts, tank tops and heels. Dressing sexually on Halloween then is a given, because the “sexy” Halloween costumes are the equivalent of normal partying clothes. It seems pretty likely that this has a trickle down effect, inspiring high school teenagers to buy sexier costumes to match the college kids’ costumes that they can see online through facebook. It would be interesting to find out what percentage of costume sales are the 18-24 year old age group.
Agreed. This has definitely been my experience. I did the sexy Halloween costume thing one year because I was going out clubbing on the Saturday night before Halloween, but that was it.
I’ve always rolled my eyes at the sexification of Halloween (I mean, really, a sexy Cookie Monster? C’mon people!). But I recently heard Dan Savage on his podcast offer a different reading. He sees Halloween as a heterosexual carnival of sorts (comparable to the gay pride parade) where straight, straight-laced folk can unbutton, go a little crazy and generally celebrate sexuality without recrimination. That makes sense to me– so long as the sexiness stays with the adults and doesn’t creep into the costumes marketed to girls.
That’s an interesting idea, but I don’t really buy it since we aren’t seeing an increase in sexy costumes for men, just women.
Au contraire! here in the burbs I am seeing men start to push the envelope more in terms of sexiness. Surprisingly (or not) it is the middle age men that are doing it. I wonder if it has anything to do with the increasing pressure for men to keep up with their fit wives?
Dan addresses that, too… to paraphrase…
In regular club wear and everyday fashion in the heterosexual world, women’s clothing tends to be tighter and more revealing than men’s. So if Halloween costumes are going the direction of regular “party clothes,” it makes sense that women’s costumes are tighter and more revealing. It’s just the way heterosexual mating/party/hook-up fashion seems to go.
He goes on to lament the lack of scantily-clad men, both in everyday club wear and on Halloween, but recognizes that “sexy” outfits on men tend to code as “queer”. Which most straight men prefer to avoid, for better or worse.
This was totally what I was thinking. I am a proud feminist, and I myself have never really worn a sexy Halloween costume, mostly because I didn’t do a lot of Halloween costumes in the key 18-24 y.o. sexy costume demographic. But I like the idea of costumes as our chance to try on all the personas we don’t quite feel comfortable donning in regular life. And for many women, an appealing persona to play with is overtly, over the top sexual.
I’ve heard this idea quoted all over the place, but I can’t say I’m really convinced. I don’t think we see the same effect in men’s costumes, for one…http://fucknosexisthalloweencostumes.tumblr.com/
A more interesting idea I came across was that every other day of the year, women are bombarded with these stereotypes of “sexy”, yet criticised for enacting them. Halloween has become an opportunity to express that stereotype because of the costumed leeway you’re all granted this one night…
Hi, Sally
Delurking here, but I have enjoyed your blog for quite some time. I’m not a fan of the hypersexualized women’s Halloween-costume trend, finding it demeaning and kinda same-old-same-old boring (I confess, here, to a somewhat theatrical bent to my everyday clothing choices!) Here is a website I’ve had sitting in my “Favorites” since last Halloween. It provides women with alternate costume ideas/choices beyond “sexy fill-in-the-blank” (and I love the creative DIY component): http://takebackhalloween.org/about/ Sending you early Day of the Dead (my favorite holiday!) greetings
Yes! Because of that website I am currently dressed as Persephone. I deplore the ridiculous “sexy such and such” costume trends. If you want to wear fetish gear please just do so in the company of other fetishists. You just look like a repressed fool when you prance around giggling in your “sexy” character costume.
I think it is silly and sad. I also think it is getting worse for boys instead of getting better for girls. I dropped off my 4-year old son to school today, he had on a big fury jumpsuit and most of his classmates had on fake muscle superhero costumes. … because a REAL man has over developed deltoids.
I’ve never been good at costumes, but this year I’m cross-dressing as Doctor Who (because bow-ties are cool) and for the first time in 20 years or so I think I’ve got one that I really like.
And has every costume maker forgotten that about half the country goes trick or treating somewhere cold? Sexy librarian dressed up in a snow suit …
I did the same thing, complete with home-sewn suspenders and tweed jacket. High five!
HIGH FIVE! No suspenders for me though … but I’ve got the screwdriver!
My thinking falls along similar lines-I assume that the original market was college-aged women, who at the time provided a large enough demand that the overly sexualized costumes became the norm. Now, however, either through deliberate backward-marketing (where items are marketed to younger and younger people) or through a trickle-down effect, it seems that, more and more, the only options are overtly sexual. I’m deeply concerned at the complacency of a society that permits its young girls to become sexualized (at all, really) at such a tender age. I think that Halloween- the one day each year when a preteen is encouraged to pretend to be absolutely anything she wants- offers enormous potential for good. However, obviously, used in such an inappropriate manner, it offers potential for great harm. I think that the internet (women bloggers in particular) is starting to push back. I just hope that more mothers (and fathers!!) take heart and actually speak to their children about the murky area that is sexual-identity and -expression.
I appreciate the though that goes into sites like Take Back Halloween:
http://takebackhalloween.org/
I hope this is just a blip and it changes soon, because it makes it hard for me to find a costume appropriate for my daughter (especially when I don’t want to make her one all the time!) Four is about the cutoff before the costumes become extremely gendered and sexified.
I did a random search to see if there was a costume that hadn’t been sexed up, and I couldn’t find a mainstream one. Sesame Street Characters? And try finding a doctor’s costume aimed for women – we’re supposed to dress up as a sexy nurse instead. It’s maddening!
Yes!!!! re: the doctor-nurse divide! It’s maddening.
I dressed up as a ghost (and later, gory) surgeon this year – I wore a white knee-length lab coat with white tights and flats, as well as turquoise dishwashing gloves and white makeup – and SO many people called me a nurse. I just pulled my gory, huge red scissors out of my pocket and snicked them at the offenders…
I don’t know about the why, but I think I’ve decided my problem with sexy Halloween costumes isn’t about actually being sexy or showing a lot of skin, it’s about buying a prepackaged collection of something labeled sexy. If you make your own pirate wench costume that shows a lot of cleavage or leg or whatever, cool. If you buy a sexy pirate costume (or sexy bee costume….????), I’m much less OK with that (partially because the “sexy” takes precedence over the whatever-the-costume-is-representing. Maybe because in my book, labeling something/yourself as sexy takes away much of the sexiness; I think I feel like true sexiness has to at least pretend it’s not intentional or you don’t know it’s there. Hard to do when you’re wearing a cut-out referee minidress.
I agree! I am bothered by the tiny, all cleavage/belly/leg/no creativity mass market costumes, but every single costume I make definitely shows off what I like about myself. I think, as you suggested, there’s a difference between “prepackaged for some dude’s enjoyment” and “sexy, because, dammit, I am.”
This on so many levels! I have been dressing “like a slut” since I was a young gal, making all my own costumes. I knew I was sexy, I wanted to dress in a way I didn’t allow myself on “normal days,” and I had fun as “bondage kitty.” It was my costume idea, I created it, and people who want to judge me will judge me. That’s their ego’s problem and not mine. I’m too busy having fun, spreading love and joy, and showing women that it’s ok to be whatever they want to be on any day to worry about how people waste their time concern trolling.
I agree whole heartedly with this. It’s okay to want to look sexy – especially on a special night that’s all about dressing up in fantasy clothes.
If a girl dresses up to look like society’s version of sexy, and she feels great, I don’t think she should be shamed for it. I think we should always remember to be SAFE about Halloween, and all the time, but have some fun and remember not every aspect of life has to be analyzed with a yardstick.
I feel like we’ve all forgotten what Halloween’s modern intent is, which is to scare the shit out of each other by dressing up as clown murderers or something.
Or maybe costume companies are just trying to frighten moms of young girls?
*shrug*
TIS THE SEASON
Oh also, I think this is relevant regarding slut-shaming on Halloween: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bHm01Tza0RM
I’m not trying to attack anyone’s views, but it’s just a good perspective to think about.
I am irritated by them myself. It seems like the ONLY costumes women can buy are sexed up costumes. Really?? I usually make my own when I need one. I almost don’t want to take the kids to the Party America store to pick out costumes, since the women ones are so scantily clad. My girl is seven and I cringed when I bought her the one she wanted, which was based on a Monster High doll. She doesn’t realize how sexified those dolls are, though. Ever watch girl cartoons? You think Barbie is scantily clad and has an impossible figure…watch some of those cartoons!
I think they’re a bit ridiculous. Call me old fashioned, but I think Halloween costumes should be scary. No superheroes, princesses or video game characters.
I wouldn’t want my child to dress up as something scary any more than I would in a sexy costume.
I think Dan Savage has it right. Halloween is an opportunity — one of the few — for a woman to release her inner slut, with no fear of recrimination. I think a lot of women, young ones in particular, get a kick out of “dressing slutty” and getting away with it for the night. We’re all sexual beings, after all. Most women don’t want to dress like that all the time, but it’s fun when it’s temporary, and an acceptable occasion. Why do girls flash their breasts at Mardi Gras? Same reason. For adult women, I don’t see a problem.
I was horrified to see sexy costumes for young girls at the Halloween shop this year, though. It’s the first time I’ve noticed them.
I’ve just done a mental checklist of my own past Halloween costumes, and I realize that I’ve never actually done sexy anything. As an adult, I’ve been a Jawa, a mad scientist, Hannibal Lecter, Darth Vader, a witch (not the sexy kind). I was a prom queen once, that’s the closest thing. But it wasn’t particularly sexy. I wore a poufy 1980s prom dress and carried flowers. So much for my inner wild girl.
I feel sexy in a great fitting pair of jeans and a silky shirt and heels, not in a flimsy polyester costume that has been mashed in a tiny plastic bag. Most of my Halloween costumes have been funny rather than sexy. Last year I tried for the sexy costume; I dressed as the mob wife from Pulp Fiction. Oddly enough, I didn’t feel very sexy, I just felt… not me.
I have teenage boys who want to dress like Michael Myers or Freddy Kruger. Trust me some of their choices worry me just as much as an overtly sexy costume might if I had daughters. I think as my kids and their friends get older, I’m much more worried about the other choices they might make on Halloween (drinking/ driving/ vandalism/ unprotected sex) than about what they wear.
This trend really disgusts me. In the Halloween store I was in with my friends last week, there was not a single scary, funny or creative costume for women (and the pre-teen girl costumes were pretty much the same). It was basically a selection of cheap, over-priced lingerie. The only option was to buy from the men’s section (and could you even make that fit?). I basically got out of there as quickly as possible and went to the thrift store…
It’s been like this through most of my young adult life, so it’s unfortunately the norm for people my age. It just seems like there’s this gross expectation to put yourself on display for the men (boys) and I’m really uncomfortable with it.
I don’t object to sexy costumes for women, but (a) I’d like some equal sexiness from the guys, please, and (b) I hate the fact that it’s really difficult to find scary/authentic/anything-but-sexy costumes for women any longer. Of course, I am more likely to put together my own thing than buy a prepackaged outfit, but if there were a wider array of costumes for women available, that could possibly change.
(This year’s costume is a vintage late-60s evening gown in turquoise chiffon & rhinestones with a brilliant turquoise wig. I am just being generally fabulous rather than anything in particular.)
Also, the geek in me hates some of the sexy costumes because they don’t look like the thing they’re supposed to be. Nobody in Harry Potter wore belly-baring T-shirts or miniskirts, so why is that the sexy wizard outfit? Cookie Monster does not look like a girl in a blue teddy; he looks like Cookie Monster! If I am dressing up as something, I want to look like that thing. If I am dressing up as a character, I want to look like that character.
Yes to the geek issues! I was trying to track down a white dress for a Princess Leia in a New Hope costume and after failing on eBay and at thrift stores, I broke down and looked on costume websites. Everything I found had a huge slit up the side AND a low cut top AND was skin tight. I kept thinking that maybe they were going for a take on her dress during the medal ceremony at the end but nope. It honestly made the geek in me super furious. If you want to be a sexy Princess Leia, wear the slave costume. Leave New Hope Princess Leia alone.
Geek rant over.
I agree a with a lot of what Aziraphale said. I’ve had friends in the past who used Halloween as an excuse to dress slutty, which normally, they don’t do. I do remember as the “non sexy” one of the group feeling over dressed. And it was cold out that night! I do think it’s a part of college culture and also a sort of natural progression of where our culture is headed. So no I don’t think it’s going to go away soon.
Also I find the idea of buying a costume a little ehhh personally. Especially sexy kids costumes. As kids my siblings and I made our costumes by ourselves. They were normally held together with safety pins and were never sexy.
Stop buying costumes and start making them. Now, do what you want and laugh as people start assuming our morals are going out the window because an industry told them so. Seriously, an industry is putting out cheap, over-priced costumes and we are discussing our morals? My issue is that people don’t use any imagination or creative skills to have fun. So what if you doubt yourself in making a costume? Those who judge and concern troll are going to do just that — F’ the nay’sayers and enjoy your ugly, poorly put together costume… at least you enjoyed making it! Be a kid again and be proud of everything you do!
I really thought of going as a Sexy Culturally Inappropriate Sexy Sex this year just so I could discuss how to appreciate culture and sexuality on the same night. I then decided biking around Houston as the Fantastic Mrs Fox with the bf was more fun.
That’s weird. Here in Brasil (yep, we have “imported” some of the Halloween traditions) there’s not many sexualized costumes. Maybe we save the sexy ones for Carnaval (hum, yes, probably).
I think it’s sad that it’s happening, because Halloween derivates from a tradition/religion/culture in wich women are so important, sooooo much more than sexual objects.
When I was younger/single/before children, I went for sexy Halloween costumes myself. BUT now that I am a sleep-deprived mother of twin 6 year old girls, my costume is repeated every year, and is a non-sexy witch. LOL I completely hate the notion of sexualizing children’s or preteen costumes. The sexy adult costume thing kinda bugs me now, but to each her own, for the most part!
Yeah I’m not a fan. It’s just… trite. Lacking in imagination. Scary costumes are better. Although my kid’s costume this year isn’t so scary – Hermione from Harry Potter – until you think about the ramifications of a seven-year-old with magical powers.
And as far as costumes for children go – at my daughter’s school (an elementary school that goes up to gr 8) I was much more disturbed by the boys’ costumes (fake overdeveloped musculature superhero dealies) than the girls – there weren’t any “sexified” costumes on any of the girls, even the 13-year-olds. Mind you this is an independent school… but I found it odd that the sexification was only in the little boys’ costumes.
I guess, though, that you could look at it as an attempt to “magnify power” – in females by enhancing sexual appeal and in males by enhancing the appearance of strength. But I really doubt any of the sexy pirates or superheroes out there are actually thinking along those lines. It’s basically just blindly following a trend. Bleh.
I have so many feelings on this subject. On one hand, as a feminist, I feel like it’s not my place to judge women for their choices. And I absolutely think every woman has the right to dress in a way that makes them feel good, and yes, sure, Halloween is a fun time to explore other realities and/or persona. On the other hand, I absolutely hate the standard sexy costumes you find in Halloween stores, for many reasons and many of those reasons have been already laid out: they are the only thing you can find, they’re uncreative, etc.
Beyond all of that, I find these costumes are so problematic in terms of body positivity. They have such a limited view of what sexy looks like, feels like, *is.* The message these costumes seem to send is if you’re not a size 6 with big boobs and long legs, you don’t get to be sexy. I know some plus sized options are available but even those fit into a very specific view of sexiness and a very specific aesthetic. As a culture, we seem to be starting to fathom that sexiness can be so many things and look and feel so many different ways but we forget all about it on Halloween.
And let’s not even start on the subject of sexy Native Americans, sexy Geishas, and sexy Middle Eastern Arab Girl (complete with Burka.) Seriously.
I think feminism can cover both your initial points, and some of body positivity as well: Women should be able to choose whatever they want…as long as they really have choices. If all that’s available and encouraged are sexy versions of whatever, and in one standard idea of what sexy is, I’m not sure that’s much of a choice.
I think it’s because they (sellers and buyers) can get away with it. “It’s just a costume,”
Two thoughts:
Slightly tongue-in-cheek: sexy versions of costumes have lower materials costs than full versions, so they’re slightly cheaper to make.
As someone who has never wanted to wear a sexy version of a something, and as one of those die-hard DIY’ers, I do distinctly resent the pressure to sexify those costumes. I very clearly remember feeling great at home putting the finishing touches on my landshark costume, and then decidedly judged and ignored in a sea of sexy cats, rabbits, librarians, etc at the event.
If others want to dress up sexily, that’s fine, but when it becomes *expected* that women show off in tiny costumes to the point where if you don’t you’re considered weird, it’s no longer really a choice or fun, but instead pressure to sexualize yourself to conform. That pressure, to me, feels like the opposite of reveling in your sexuality, and instead makes it a requirement.
Funny, but when I was 15 or 16 in the mid-1980s, I made myself a rather skimpy genie/belly dancer Halloween costume out of an old nightgown & sheer scarves from the thrift store. It show my midsection & was somewhat low cut, more revealing than “I Dream of Genie,” but my mother & I didn’t think I looked like a hooker or anything. But my idea was definitely to look sexy & attract attention. *shrug* It’s something a young person is interested in (& presumably older people too!).
I think the idea of sexy Halloween costumes isn’t new, & the idea of using this transgressive holiday to attract a mate (however temporary) has been around for a long time. What’s changed is the marketing. Halloween has become big business — it’s second only to Christmas for holiday decor sales in the U.S. So of course businesses are going to latch onto common themes & exploit the crap out of them. Notice how the vast majority of the decorations are extremely violent & gory? It’s hard to find cute, kid-friendly, or adult & classy decor (they exist, but they’re a very small minority; Martha Stewart is about the only seller). Same with costumes, they skew to one big theme, sexy, while scary & cute are in the minority. It sells. *shrug* Just means you have to buy from the few places that sell the kind you want so they stay in business, & the more creative of us have to make our own.
This. This isn’t a new trend; I was doing it in the 80s. I wore basically all stretch black lace to a party once (enough layers to be decent, but not by much), along with a hat and carried a small upright vacuum cleaner. Told people I was a 20th century witch; we use power tools.
The difference is that now it’s big business and Sexy has become the norm rather than a way to stand out. To me as soon as you buy a pre-packaged costume you’ve given up, and THOSE are the ones pushing sexy.
My recollection is that you stopped celebrating halloween in your teens, might come back to it around college age and stopped again after that. That appears to no longer be the case, in part because parents are dressing up to take their kids out (rather than just going in street clothes).
I’m curious what you mean by “a long time.” This holiday, traditionally, is not about finding a mate. IActually, quite the opposite: the roots of Samhain lie in agrarian cycles, and the end of October is the end of the productive cycle. It honours the sacrifice and necessity of death which come at the end of the fertile season. Mates and mating are the focus of a number of spring festivals – but not Samhain.
This is just so fitting!
http://www.someecards.com/halloween-cards/halloween-costume-women-romney-funny-ecard
Even if it’s so, so not true?
Agreed. Do not like.
I’ll weigh in the same as a few others–it’s the morphing of Halloween (originally Samhain) into Carnaval or a Gay Pride Parade, or a masquerade party that bugs me. It’s Samhain, people! It’s meant to be dark! It’s the Open Door to the Underworld! Don’t get me wrong, I love masquerade parties, I love Gay Pride, I love embracing other personas, and I say, heck, if you want to play the persona of a sexy slut do it any dang day you please.
In short: Halloween is now represented as just one more commercial bag of crap that presents women with the “option” of liberating themselves by dressing like a hetero-normative slut. Yawn.
I know there were some comments above that mentioned how it is a college aged trend, and most likely it is. However, my best friend and I had on full compression pants, long sleeve shirts, and toddler pull over versions of an airplane and a race car. It was silly, fun, and all of the girls at the party that had on “sexy” versions of such and such were all complimenting our costumes. I think as long as one is comfortable and feels like they can dress however they want for Halloween, then go for it.
Also, I know several college aged men that were way more sexified than my friends or I. Several went as Magic Mike, and my guy roommate went as LMFAO with skin tight zebra pants and a gold blazer that showed off his abs. Funny to see the difference.
I am disgusted by it as well and was wondering when people were going to start speaking out about this. I don’t believe in immodest dress-period, but I was wondering how far the general population would let this go. I
With my kids, we try to celebrate Halloween for the true meaning that is: All Hallow’s Eve which means the night before All Soul’s Day- a solemn feast day for Catholics in which we remember the poor souls in purgatory. Like most holidays, this one has been hijacked by pop culture and made into something it was never intended to be.
I try to put together saint costumes for my kids (All Saints Day follows All Souls Day) or something that is at least non-scary/ghoulish and of course modest! I don’t understand how people think it’s cute for kids to parade around in things that could arouse a perverted neighbor. As for me and my house, we will not be the subject for child pornography!
correction: We celebrate Halloween on the evening before All Saints Day. The word itself is a shortened form of “All Hallows’ Eve,” which quite literally means “the eve of All Saints.”
sorry, got my facts wrong in the above comment.
I wanted to add that All souls day is the day after all Saints day. I always get those confused.
This is not a new trend.
I can’t be specific about Halloween, but carnival, masquerade, and fancy dress costumes (in the Western world, for the last several hundred years) have consistently pushed beyond the standard of “decent” dress for the day. I was reading just recently that some 1500s masque costumes bared the breasts completely. The supposedly “prudish” Victorians wore short skirts as part of their fancy dress ensembles. Feet, ankles, and calves all visible. I won’t get started on the Myth of the Indecent Ankle; I’ll just say it was a myth, and leave it at that. Nonetheless showing that much leg wasn’t acceptable – except for fancy dress. In that case, short skirts were perfectly normal.
I am 23 and wanted to share my experience after reading through these comments because in the past few years I have seen a shift in the way my peers have been dressing for Halloween. First off, I have always made my costumes and had to be creative as possible because as a child, my mother never wanted to buy costumes to wear one day a year. I have never dressed up in a pre-packaged “sexy” costume but always felt pressured to. When I was 18 I went to a Halloween party with a crowd of 25+. I had put together an amazing Puss N’ Boots costume and had a great mix of masculine and feminine. When I realized the party was going to be an older crowd I wanted to throw on a short tight mini skirt and heels and be a “sexy Puss n’ Boots” Why? Because I thought I would be perceived as childish. My sister encouraged me to be myself and stick with my original costume. When I arrived, I immediately noticed how all the women were dressed in sexy this, and sexy that. I kept my chin up and my confidence about me and half way through the night… I felt sexy. I was getting attention from men not because they were turned on by my lady assets but because I had an interesting and creative costume, I could strike up a conversation and make people laugh. From then on, I always put together witty, creative and interesting costumes and if they showed off some leg or where skin tight, so be it. In the past couple of years since my peers have moved from the pressure of high school and freshmen/sophomore college days and are more comfortable in their own skin, I’ve notice that those pre-packaged sexy costumes are being seen as tacky. No one would want to be caught wearing a mindless outfit that could be seen on 4 other people at the party. Also, in my view (at least for men worth dating) and the views of my many guys friends, men are more attracted to women who look classy, funny, creative, sophisticated or cute on Halloween then over-the-top, leave nothing to the imagination “sexy.” Recently, women are dressing in more humorous, political, historical and cute costumes. I’m seeing more Amelia Earharts then sexy nurses and more Emma Peels then beer maids. I also completely agree with Dan Savage. I see no problem with taking advantage of an opportunity to jumble up social norms and I don’t necessarily see it as objectifying ones self. It’s great to dress up as a sexy, powerful women like Laura Croft and Cat Women. The point that I’m making is that once women become comfortable being themselves they tend to dress in more creative costumes to avoid looking cheap or tacky and if more young women received advise like I received from my sister, maybe more younger girls would be less susceptible to pressure.
I agree with those that posted they think it may be related to a “straight pride parade” or a way for women to “unleash” their inner sluts but I am so glad to have the link from an earlier poster about costumes for women with an imagination. Thanks!
For my part I will add that a long while ago, I was fresh out of university and was invited to a Hallowe’en party at a bar. I was a bit naive, maybe, because I went all-out and dressed up as a clown: multicoloured curly wig, harlequin outfit with the circular insert, big red feet and a big red nose. I painted up my face and thought I looked pretty authentic. I showed up at my friend’s place and they had ALL dressed as “sexy witches”. They encouraged my authentic clown costume and said I was gutsy. I wasn’t sure if they meant because I had gone the whole nine yards but it was nice to be validated. Well, we got to the bar and EVERYONE was a sexy fairy/witch/nurse/hooker/whatever. I will never forget the moment a very good looking man walked right up to me and said: “Gawd, are you a man or a woman?” and then hit on my sexy witch girlfriends.
Lesson taken from that episode? I didn’t ever want to feel un-sexy compared to other women. So, do other women dress in a sexy way because of competition?
For the record, I still don’t dress sexy but I prefer to dress smart and think up clever costumes that let others see my inner beauty and intelligence – and I intend to use takebackhalloween website to do it next year. And hopefully I’ll be identified as a woman!
I’m not a big fan of the film Mean Girls in general, but there is one funny scene like this, where all the ‘cool girls’ dress sexy, and the main character comes as a real zombie bride. . .
Oh my lord… what an icky experience. No fun at all.
It really doesn’t bother me. It’s all up to personal choice. Kid costumes are another story, though, and I’m generally not okay with that.
I agree with Susannah, that it’s the college-party culture, and just society going downhill in general. I mean, clothes in general have been getting skimpier, so it only makes sense for costumes to follow. It’s always bothered me though. Sexy French maid, I can understand. Sexy pirate? Sexy Little Red Riding Hood? Sexy Scooby Doo? They’re just cheap/trashy and don’t require any effort. I’m sorry, but wearing a black bikini with an eyepatch is NOT a pirate costume.
I’ve been pretty face-palmy at sexy costumes on past Halloweens. This year, though, I disovered this Jenna Marbles video…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RPPsf-Mi8FY
At Dan Savage’s and Jenna Marbles’ ecouragement, I hereby challenge myself to applaud the ladies (and occasional gentlemen) who go balls-out sexy. It does take guts to do… especially on cold nights. They’re not hurting anyone. (It’s gonna be hard, because my knee-jerk reaction is “PUT ON PANTS!”)
I find that the attitude of “Oh, the poor thing, she’s been victimized by the patriarchal Halloween-industrial complex” is a bit patronising, as it implies that the woman in question is incapable of critical thinking — or making her own costume if she wants — or that she’s being a woman *wrong.*
I don’t like that attitude toward everyday sexy/feminine fashion, and I don’t like it on Halloween. We face similar pressure to wear lipstick, low-cut tops, tight jeans, etc, because that’s what’s primarily available in stores, advertized in magazines, etc. Does that mean that women who wear this stuff are just victims of the patriarchy? Not in my book.
So… I’m going to change my thinking, dammit.
I was just speaking about this with my friends and we noted that here in Ireland, its going out of fashion! There were certainly a few sexy nurses, nuns etc. Out clubbing this weekend but by and large, most women were doing the scary thing! I think its a fad that seems to be dying as noone wants to come across as trying too hard!
I’d like to add… some of these comments are a bit too close to slut-shaming for my comfort level. That’s not what I come to this website for.
I agree; I was rather surprised by this… It’s all down to personal choices and what you feel comfortable with.
I’m frustrated by the sexualization of halloween, but I’m frustrated by the sexualization of everything. What’s ridiculous is the exclusivity of it. It has gotten to the point where the ONLY commercially-available female costumes are sexy. This year was a prime example for me, as I’m going to a party dressed as Ann Perkins from Parks and Recreation. (my husband does a fantastic Chris Trager impression, so it was kind of a no-brainier.) I decided my costume should be nurse’s scrubs, since Ann is a nurse.
I couldn’t find a SINGLE nurse costume that wasn’t sexy. Everything Halloween-related (i.e. included accessories like stethoscopes) was either sexy, or sized for men and labeled “Doctor costume.” It wasn’t the end of the world because I found well-priced scrubs on Amazon.com, but it really shed a strong light on the lack of non-sexy options for women these days. It’s ridiculous, and that’s not even going into the complete lack of modesty in costumes I see highschool-aged girls wearing.
Also, inspired by Caroline’s comment, Sexy French Maid, I understand. Sexy Body Bag? Sexy Cookie Monster? SERIOUSLY!?
I feel conflicted about this. On the one hand, I feel like women should be allowed to wear what they want to wear, especially on the one night we’re “allowed” to try on another persona. I feel that “slut-shaming” someone for wearing a sexy costume is a slippery slope to contributing to the rape culture of “well, she dressed sexy, so she asked for it”…even if “she” didn’t.
But on the other hand, I’m a teacher, and I want to encourage girls to not get their pride or their value from their looks and their appeal to men, but on their brains, their creativity, their personalities, etc. And I do see the sexy costumes being marketed to younger girls and women.
I won’t judge a woman on what costume she decides to wear for like four hours one night out of the year.
Many women enjoy playing up their sexuality once in a while. However, doing so in the public realm can lead to a lot of misunderstanding or even danger. Halloween gives women that space to exaggerate their sexuality without fearing a ton of social repercussions. In this society, I feel we have an unhealthy adore/despise relationship with overt sexuality. Well, Halloween lets women bask in the “adore” side of that without so much of the “despise.”
Women should be allowed to express their sexuality any day of the year without fear of being harassed or shamed. But, when so much emphasis is put on this one very specific “idealized” version of sexy I think that can be damaging to body image, especially in teens and young girls.
For younger kids there is even starting to be gender specific costumes, they’re not sexualized, but still give the impression that a boy can be what he wants while the girls needs to be “pretty”. For instance, Cookie Monster costumes “for girls” that are blue dresses with cookies on them and a little cookie monster hat, rather than the “boys” costume that just looks like Cookie Monster. It’s ridiculous.
I think judging someone because they choose to use the holiday as a chance to express sexuality–blatant sexuality without shame or apology–is just as problematic as someone feeling pressured into dressing in a sexualized manner when they aren’t comfortable with.
It seems like there is a [wonderful] movement to accept women’s personal styles and to encourage women to feel comfortable dressing in a way that feels authentic to them. Why should acceptance of that end when the woman’s comfortable style is tight and revealing and unabashedly sexual, whether she feels that way 365 of just for a few hours on October 31st?
I think we need to encourage girls and women to be comfortable not dressing in a sexy manner if they aren’t comfortable with that, but I think we need to be just as accepting of tiny costumes as we are of those which offer head to toe coverage. If not all types of authenticity and personal comfort are encouraged, then we’re still shaming those who are different.
To quote Cady in the movie “Mean Girls”: “In the real world, Halloween is when kids dress up in costumes and beg for candy. In Girl World, Halloween is the one day a year when a girl can dress up like a total slut and no other girls can say anything else about it.”
I think this is a variation on Dan Savage’s wisdom that is cited above. (I love Dan Savage so much.) Even before the sexy trend, Halloween costumes have long been about having the opportunity to express aspects of ourselves that we don’t express normally (our wild sides, our macabe sides, our sick and twisted sense of humor, etc.). Since our culture is so into slut-shaming, I can’t blame women for wanting to take advantage of one day a year when they can celebrate this aspect of their sexual selves and not be judged for it (or, realistically, not be judged as harshly as they would under most other circumstances). In college, I dressed up as an anime character, a dominatrix, a pregnant nun, and a Playboy bunny, and I think I turned out OK.
Do I dress that way in real life? Hell no! I didn’t embrace figure-conscious dressing until after I graduated. I was a self-conscious geek, and it was nice have a pass, just for just one day, to forget my body issues and celebrate my figure.
Nowadays, I know a couple who hosts an annual “Inappropriately Sexy Halloween Party,” the sole point of which is for the attendees to come up with their own inappropriately sexy costumes. And by “inappropriate,” I mean, “Sexy Abe Lincoln,” “Sexy Westboro Baptist Protester,” “Sexy Groucho Marx,” “Sexy Roadkill,” “Sexy Suicide Bomber,” etc. I love the idea of poking fun like that.
I think what concerns me about the trend is that it sometimes seems that women’s participation in civic life and popular culture is already relatively limited to what can be eroticized quite narrowly. I may get in some trouble for saying this, but the recent Lena Dunham/pro-Obama ad which eroticized women’s participation in the electorate concerned me for the same reason. Obviously I’m painting with a broad brush here, but sometimes I feel that American mainstream culture is still only and mostly comfortable with women functioning in public spaces only if they do so as sexualized, eroticized creatures.
Yes, this.
Totally. And it becomes the binary standard by which other women are judged (sexually desirable/sexually undesirable) So frustrating.
I should have clarified in my previous comment that by contrast, there always seems to be plenty of room for civic/social participation by men without their having to overtly trumpet an eroticized sexuality.
I’m fine with sexy Halloween costumes, as long as they’re worn by adults, and in appropriate settings. What I’m not OK with are packaged costumes, or throwing some cat ears over your sluttiest black clothing and hitting the town. If you’re going to dress up, make an effort. Come up with an idea and make it happen yourself. Don’t rely on costume companies to tell you what to wear for Halloween. There are thrift stores and craft stores and friends with clothing and props you can borrow. Get creative and stop giving these cheap packaged costumes so much attention.
What’s important to me is that people leave the house dressed as something other than themselves (and not just their normal clothes with a cheap prop).
Be as sexy as you like, men and women both, every day of the year if you can get away with it. If Halloween is the only time you can let out your inner sex god/goddess, then embrace it (and go make friends with people who like to have costume parties year-round).
I LOVE the “Inappropriately Sexy Halloween Costume” party idea. Totally going to steal it!
We tend more toward goofy costumes, in my family. Much more fun, much more comfortable to wear. Examples: 1. My sister hot-glued Froot Loops all over a white sheet, poked a hole in the middle of the sheet for her head to go through, and went as a bowl of cereal. 2. My brother-in-law took his last-year’s chicken dress (don’t ask!) and turned it into a version of Bjork’s famous swan dress. A black wig turned him into Bjork Gone Way Downhill.
Each of these people is very sexy, all the time. They don’t have to dress in a sexually suggestive manner to be sexy. Smart is always sexy.
I’ve loved reading the comments on this.
Personally, as an adult, I enjoy having the choice to be a little naughty on Halloween. Sometimes it’s because the costume I want just is naturally sexy (say, The Black Queen, one of the personas of Jean Grey), other times it’s because I was going to a bar and it wasn’t any more cleavage than I would have worn in non-costume clothing. But I am an adult (and generally going to adult parties) and my husband was a huge fan of the Black Queen costume. Of anything, I’m glad a big cape was part of it so I could cover up when it felt too much.
This year, I was at Disney and I went to buy something because I was short on time. I really didn’t see anything I would be comfortable wearing at a family event or it seemed that it was just a tube and I could sew a tube. I guess what I lament is not the sexiness of costumes available, it’s the lack of non-sexy options. But you always have the option to go to a thrift store and put something less revealing together yourself. People will put what sells on a shelf. Maybe the people who want full coverage just aren’t buying from the Halloween pop up stores.
In the end, I made my dress and purchased a crown. I already had a cape, I sewed a quick dress to be the Evil Queen from Snow White. The dress is clingy, so I feel curvy and lovely, but everything is covered so it’s family friendly.
And as for gender… Personally, I don’t need to see skin exposed on men to find them sexy. I like well defined shoulders but look at Johnny Depp as Captain Jack Sparrow, he’s totally sexy but not showing much skin.
As far as the Dan Savage comment re: Halloween as a kind of straight variant of Pride Parade goes, I really think we’re overlooking the fact that such a thing already exists: it’s Carnival, it’s Mardi Gras.
As for me, I’ve never been overly fond of the sexy costumes, for a couple of reasons. The primary one, however, is interest. I love the idea of costumes and dressing up, and I always want a really good, really detailed costume, made well, from good (non-flammable!) materials.I also want something original, something that I find interesting. Or something with great design, and good aesthetics. Frankly, none of these things can be found in those cheap sexy costumes that are one-size-fits-all and come in a bag. I’ve been La Fee Verte, a faun (did show some midriff there, though everyone was too amazed at the hairy goats’ legs I’d built for myself, complete with hand-carved and painted cloven hooves, to really notice or care about a bare stomach), a flapper (i went for a period-appropriate hem length – longer than the Chicago costumes!), and this year as a nebula. I’m not a fan of the sexualization of women’s costumes, but in part because it just feels unoriginal and uninteresting to me; it seems like the focus is the skin, not the costume (and I’m always more interested in the costume).
Re: Carnival/Mardi Gras-as-straight pride… it’s not widely celebrated.
It would be a bit much to expect someone to say, “Hey, wait a minute! I am heterosexual and wish to express my sexuality in a public celebration devoid of slut-shaming. I hereby petition the City/State of XYZ to recognize Mardi Gras as a public service.”
I’d guess that in areas where Mardi Gras is a big deal, Halloween is not as sexified as in areas where there isn’t such an outlet. Culture is mutable and the meanings of holidays change.