Recommended Listening: The Refugees by Andrew Solomon

I’ve listened to this story from The Moth twice.

The first time I listened to it I had been feeling so helpless and depressed and sorry for myself, and it shook me awake and reminded me how grateful I should be for everything in my life. And I mean everything. I wept.

The second time I listened to it, I realized that it touched on a topic close to my heart: How important it is for women to feel beautiful, loved, close to other women. I wept.

It is not a story to listen to if you’re among strangers, or about to go into a meeting, or if you’ve just put on your eye makeup. But it is a story that is so beautiful and moving and worthwhile that I hope you will all take the time to listen to it.

PLEASE BE AWARE: This story includes extremely graphic descriptions of rape, genocide, and torture. It ends in a peaceful place, but begins with extremely upsetting content. If you may be triggered by any such content, please refrain from listening.

The Refugees by Andrew Solomon

(Click here if embedded player doesn’t work.)

I highly recommend subscribing to The Moth’s podcast. I have heard some of the most amazing, uplifting, life-changing, perspective-shifting stories on that thing, I swear.

http://web.mac.com/renaissancewriter/iWeb/RenaissanceWriter/Welcome.html Rguillory

How is it I’d never heard of the Moth? A treasure! Thank you for posting this (and the Fiona Apple, too). Happy Sunday!
Lauren

Wow… Sal, I don’t know what to say. It’s just wonderful.

Her poor daughter, though. I’m around the age of sixteen, and I know that would be a horrible experience to go through at any age, but because he mentioned an age that was close to mine, I feel a real empathy with this girl. I really hope that she knew Jesus.
Anon

Oh, Sal.

Could you please include a more extensive warning about the content? I’m sure it’s a meaningful and excellent story, but the description of violence at the very beginning was so disturbing to me that I can’t listen to the rest. It’s triggering, to be honest, and I really, really feel ashamed of my own weakness here – but I can’t listen to stories like that one. I realize it’s a sign of my privilage and my safety and I’m positive that I would gain some much-needed perspective from the podcast as a whole, but hearing narratives like that feels so damaging and destructive to me, it hurts so much, that I can’t do it.

I teach about the Khmer Rouge when I teach about evil and genocide, I’m not advocating ignorance, but I can’t bear to listen to this story. Thanks for posting it, as I’m sure other people will have a different/better/more courageous response, but if you could post a warning, it would be much appreciated.
- http://www.alreadypretty.com Sal
  
  Of course. Thanks for bringing that up.
Sandie

Dear Sal,

Thank you for posting this amazing and moving piece. I remember the basic story from The Noonday Demon (which is great), and it’s even better when you can hear Solomon’s voice.

The story also confirms your guiding idea that feeling beautiful can have a profound effect on how we relate to ourselves and others.

All the best,

S.
- http://www.alreadypretty.com Sal
  
  Sandie, I’ve been meaning to grab a copy of “Noonday Demon.” Solomon has done a couple of stories on The Moth, all about depression, and they’ve been absolutely stellar.
  - Sandie
    
    Thanks, Sal, I’ll look for them! (And how fabulous that Andrew Solomon himself has posted a thank-you.)
    
    Take good care,
    
    S.
Andrew Solomon

Dear Sal,

I was looking for something else and got a Google alert that led me to your posting, and am so touched and moved by how you’ve all responded to my work. Thank you for your generosity of spirit.

Best ever,

Andrew
Stef

The moth is such a gem of a podcast. Very few people it seems know about it. I love that you get every type of story, ones that make you laugh or cry or examine your own life

Good stuff!
Meg

This is enormously beautiful and moving. I wept as I listened, too.

Thank you for sharing this.