Lovely Links: 5/20/11

I wrote a short essay for The Frisky about vulvar vestibulitis, a condition I’ve had for a little over two years. Stop by and take a peek.

These tips for styling scarves are such fun. And they’re all from 1951!

I shared a little about my post-college journey over at Yes and Yes in advance of the launch of the Post College Survival Kit.

“… how can I judge other people based on their style or physical appearances if some of the things I love the most about myself are viewed as imperfections by others?”

Acne does it again with this mouth-watering pair of cream-colored wedge boots.

I assume you’ve all heard about the charming Psychology Today post claiming that Black women are just less attractive. Scientifically speaking, of course. The post has since been removed from the Psychology Today site, likely because the editor was on lunch when it went live. Or because she belatedly realized that it was a steaming heap of offensive bullshit.

This outfit is chic, sleek, and pared-down in the best possible way.

Did you know that you can’t wear a mini skirt after age 35? Or wear your hair long after 53? The Daily Mail says so, and Elissa has some choice words for them about these arbitrary, confining, age-based fashion rules.

Sydne from Think Thru Fashion asked me to style up a staple from my wardrobe. I chose my trusty denim leggings!

Do you feel comfortable telling someone that their outfit could use some tweaks? Are you more likely to offer unsolicited feedback to your partner than to friends or family?

Happiness and self-love are important because we need to be sane and functioning to do the great work of our lives, to make a difference, to be able to take on the tough moments that will forge us stronger and better than ever.”

Pretty sure this is the most gorgeous maternity dress I’ve ever seen. Ever. In my life ever.

I was lucky enough to meet Sabrina at a recent event and friends, lemme tell ya, she is the package: Smart, funny, gorgeous, and a super talented writer. Her video series on personal style is absolutely top notch, and includes a segment on how to wear a hijab with earrings, a highly controversial practice that she both implements and explains in her post.

College Candy highlights eight affordable colorblocked pieces.

Angline from The New Professional did a fab guest post at Modly Chic on making your work clothes work for after-hours events.

V shares some tips for wearing black through spring and summer.

Reader Erin sent me over to Curve Appeal, a fabulously body-positive blog for curvy gals. Beware, though, lots of photos are self-portraits of gals in their underwear – not safe for work viewing.

Amy Poehler marks up her own photo for Photoshopping. She’d like at least two more fingers, please. (Via The Beheld)

And from the Department of Random: I feel like I’ve posted this before, but it is oh so worth a second viewing. I studied Spanish for seven years and was nearly fluent when I quit to focus on other topics. This is such a perfectly constructed example of how students love to play with the unfamiliar rhyming sounds in a studied language. Also any rap that throws the word “moustache” in there three times? Two thumbs up.

  • Kay

    Hugs, Sally! This too shall pass.

  • http://www.amidprivilege.com Lisa

    Oh, gosh, Sally, so sorry to hear about your health issues, and SO hoping they resolve. In all ignorance I have to ask – did you ever think that bike riding might have contributed?

    • http://www.alreadypretty.com Sal

      I did, and although in some cases biking can contribute in my case, thankfully, it doesn’t!

  • http://sidewalkchic.com joann, sidewalk chic

    Thanks so much for posting your college series over at Yes and Yes. I feel like we probably had very similar experiences leaving college — wanting to pursue journalism and not having the resources/skills/connections to launch those writing careers (though with me, it was more like a lack of jobs to apply for because of the recession/growing use of Internet killing off print, and not being able to do unpaid internships in expensive cities). I actually started my blog because I missed writing everyday. It was great to read of your experiences and know more about your career journey. I am really looking forward to this series! :)

  • Susan

    I am so sorry to read of your medical condition. I had not been familiar with that. Good for you, eliminating sugar from your diet. I know it’s not easy. Surely there is a specialist somewhere who knows more. Thanks for sharing this.

  • http://www.pinemeadowpond.com Beth Lowe

    Sally, I’ve only been reading your blog for a month or so, but you and your writing have already become an important part of my regular blog reading. I just read your essay at The Frisky; it’s really good. Though I don’t suffer from vulvar vestibulitis and can only have the barest idea of how life-altering it is, I have my own ongoing issues with chronic pain, and I’m so sorry to hear you’re dealing with this. You’re in my thoughts.

  • Bec

    HI Sally,
    This is of no relation to your post, but I just wanted to let you know that I love you. In the least creepy way possible, of course. This year I’ve gone from jeans and tshirt to an eccentric glamour that makes me feel wonderful every day, and your blog has helped me so much along the way. Thankyou!

  • Anat

    I am so sorry to read about your painful condition. I wanted to say thank you for discussing it openly. That takes a lot of courage, and I really appreciate you for doing it to help others who have no idea what they’re suffering from yet. Hopefully they can go through a shorter and less painful and frustrating process than you have. Respect and love, Anat.

  • Kylara7

    The Psychology Today piece about the “science” behind black women being less attractive was written by a male author who has a history of opinion-masquerading-as-“science” writing that is sexist, racist, and generally horrible. His personal brand of “evolutionary psychology” consists of a bunch of jargon and science words put together to justify his own ideas about biology and destiny…which coincidentally tend to resemble a modern misogynist world view. As an actual scientist, I am offended that Psy Today give this asshat a forum and I only hope this this time he has finally crossed the line that will get him the boot.

  • Kylara7

    A great critique of the Psychology Today piece from a science perspective, by an actual practicing scientist is here: http://scienceblogs.com/pharyngula/2011/05/i_guess_even_psychology_today.php

  • http://narrowly-tailored.com S. of Narrowly Tailored

    I’m so sorry to hear about your health issues, but I’m so glad you’ve shared your story and hope it prevents other women from suffering in silence!

    Thanks so much for the sweet shout-out! I really, really appreciate it.

    Hope you have a lovely weekend!

  • http://jroselkim.wordpress.com RK

    Thanks so much for sharing your personal stories about health and your post-college road to your current careers. I often find both issues are not really frankly discussed (especially the ugly parts – like the lack of diagnosis or breakups/breakup-related relocations) so I appreciated reading them.

  • http://www.gritandglamour.com GRIT & GLAMOUR

    Thank you so much for the mention, and including my post in your list, Sally! Super flattered!

  • http://the-new-professional.blogspot.com Angeline

    Thanks for the shout-out hon!

  • sara

    Sally, thanks for sharing your story. Wishing you well! and THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU for posting the link to Sabrina’s blog. Been reading all day (and will prob. be reading it all night). You are amazing and we all love you to pieces!

  • http://whofilets.blogspot.com Claudia T

    I love the Troy and Abed clips. I also like that they do something I know from Japanese language studying- did you notice that what one ends on (Troy first ends on Discoteca) the other starts with? I learned to play a game where one person says a word, and the next person thinks of a word that starts with the last syllable or syllables in the last word. It’s easier in Japanese (with the syllable thing), although it’s fun in English- with letters and sounds also, like EngliSH->SHamaN->NanNY->NErO->OrnithologY etc.

  • Sarah

    Sally, thank you for sharing your experiences with vulvar vestibulitis; I was diagnosed with this in September, having suffered with it for 4 years. Doctors repeatedly told me it was all in my head or ‘wasn’t a significant problem’ and I should just live with it. Since diagnosis I am still getting blank looks from some doctors – it sometimes feels like I’m the only person in the world to have this condition, so it was a comfort to read your article (although I’m very sorry that you are suffering with it). I didn’t know sugar could be a trigger; I’d been considering giving up refined sugar anyway and your article has been the push I needed to get on with it!

  • DCGal

    Sally (and Sarah) – I’ve also been suffering from vulvodynia for the past few years, though it’s improved significantly (at times almost completely) during that time. I know what it’s like to feel terrified, alone, uncertain, etc. due to this painful – physically and emotionally – disease. Just wanted to say that although every case is different, 1. there are steps you can take to at least lessen your pain level, some of which Sally mentions, and many women make great progress 2. there are experienced and sympathetic doctors (and frequently they’re not doctors but physician’s assistants or nurses – not to mention therapists) who can listen and help you 3. there is hope. This is only one part of your life. Don’t despair, it DOES get better. I think it’s a travesty that more health professionals aren’t aware of the disease and that our understanding of it is so limited, and that treatment still often comes down to trial and ever. That’s why it’s so important for people like Sally to be talking publicly about it. Women’s gynecological health continues to be misunderstood and marginalized, and we need to speak up to change that. I encourage everyone who is able to check out the Nat’l Vulvodynia Assoc. (www.nva.org) and make a donation if able.

  • DCGal

    That should obviously have said “trial and error.” : )

  • http://www.coutureallure.com Couture Allure

    Thanks for including my article about scarves from 1951! Your blog was the number 1 referrer to mine that day. I’m a little late to the party.