I mentioned in last week’s link roundup that I’d be participating in Rabbit Write’s No Makeup Week, and I kept my word. I’ve said time and again that I’m a total newbie when it comes to cosmetics, and I think most of you are aware that my daily makeup routine consists of an eyebrow pencil and some lipgloss. (Lipgloss only when I remember.) So is my participation in this experiment even valuable? What does it matter if a woman who only wears minimal makeup goes without?
Well, here’s the thing. I could only stomach doing ONE DAY without my penciled-in brows and made sure to wait until yesterday, when my menstrually-inspired acne fest had mostly cleared up. I’m certainly not ashamed of my bare face, but I was apprehensive about how different I’d look without my usual cosmetics. I certainly have no problem drawing attention to myself, but I prefer to be intentional about it. I worried that subtracting something that contributes to my perceived daily appearance might just look like an oversight.
And so it was with mild apprehension that I high-tailed it to the office yesterday looking like this:
And no one noticed. Or, at least, no one commented. In fact, as HM and I were saying our goodbyes before work, he told me I looked especially beautiful. I said it was naked-face day, and he said he’d never have noticed if I hadn’t pointed it out.
Does that mean I’m going to stop filling in my eyebrows, or ditch the lipgloss? No. Does that mean I look “better” without makeup? No. Does my participation in this project mean that I consider makeup a tool of oppression, that I believe makeup devotees hate their natural faces, or that I think all women should go bare-faced every day? Hells no.
Makeup is one of many tools we have at our stylistic disposal, and it can highlight what we love about our gorgeous faces. It can also mask what we don’t love about our gorgeous faces, and that is not inherently harmful. While total self-acceptance is a worthy goal, as we travel that long road we are allowed to chose for ourselves what we celebrate and what we downplay. And makeup can help us do either or both.
But I don’t think any woman should feel obliged to wear makeup in order to feel gorgeous, presentable, or like herself. I will admit to being troubled when a woman tells me she panics at the thought of being seen without makeup – even by her spouse, partner, family, or close friends. Because I believe that self-love and acceptance should include all versions of the self: Done to the nines, work-ready, gym-ready, sleep-ready, and buck-naked top to toe. If a woman prefers how she looks with a makeup, that’s fine. I prefer how I look with a belted waist, so I belt my waist most days. If a woman thinks she’s a repellent goblin without makeup, that’s something that should be pondered. And if I ever get to the point where I can’t wear a sack-shaped tunic and flats without having a panic attack, that’s something that should be pondered, too.
Enter No Makeup Week. Rabbit asked women to examine their relationships with cosmetics during the course of this week and draw their own conclusions. She said, “The philosophy is this: Makeup is great. It is a powerful tool, a way to express yourself, your mood, and your interior life. But when you can’t go without something, it loses its spark.” And I agree. Understanding the powers and limitations of any tool helps build a healthy, beneficial relationship with that tool. But when an appearance-related tool becomes integral to self-acceptance, it may impede important emotional and personal growth. So I applaud Rabbit for creating a project that encourages us to question and ponder and discuss.
And although I only went a day without makeup, I believe that my relationship with cosmetics is sound and healthy. I am unlikely to go to work or to coffee or to a business meeting without patting on a bit of powder and glossing my lips, but I go to the gym without a stitch of makeup two to three times per week. More importantly, I still feel like me when I’m barefaced and I still recognize myself when I look in the mirror. The decisions I make about makeup are informed decisions, choices about how I want to present myself to the observing world.
I prefer myself with a cinched waist. I prefer myself with my hair worn curly. I prefer myself in bright and jewel-toned clothing. I prefer myself with a darker, more defined brow and a splash of lip gloss. I’m defining those preferences myself and acting accordingly.
And that’s my prerogative.
{ 41 comments… read them below or add one }
Most of the time, I'm comfortable not wearing any makeup, but I'm not going to lie: there are days that it helps lift/boost my mood. It's a tool that helps confidence. However, nothing is better for your self-steem than having yourself and your husband looking at you when you're wearing nothing special but what God gave you and realizing that it is ALL awesome!
Have a nice Friday,
xoxo
http://jungleworldcitizen.blogspot.com/
My husband actually hates it when I wear makeup and says it cheapens my natural beauty : )
I on the other had feel my face is brightened with a filled in brow and some mascara!
My grandma told me once that no one likes a shiny face. It's a tad humorous now as the 'dew kissed' look was/is in. I still fondly think of my grandma when I powder the shine away : )
Most days I go without makeup because I battle with acne. I would rather win the fight then add more gunk to my pores. Therefore I didn't feel the need need to participate.
It's early though and I'm curious to read other comments : )
I love that your hubby is so free with the compliments – it is a wonderful thing. After 12 years of marriage I don't hear those things very often.
After I had Lasik surgery I couldn't wear eye makeup for at least a week, I think it was. Maybe 2 weeks? So, I pretty much was makeup free, with the exception of powder to stop the shiny. It was liberating to not wear makeup, but I prefer to wear it when out and about. I don't wear it when I'm just home and not doing anything. I even posted a picture of me makeup free on my blog this week, because it was a happy picture of me and my kids.
No makeup
this actually hit pretty close to home for me. i prefer to wear makeup, and although i don't tend to wear a lot (i do when i have time to play with it! YAY MAKEUP), i always always always pencil in my brows. even if i'm deathly sick and running to the store for medicine, i pencil in my brows. well, maybe not that extreme, but you get the picture. my natural brows are quite a bit more sparse than yours, and they don't match my hair color, so they look really "off" when they aren't all there. interestingly enough, my eyebrows are generally the first thing people compliment me on when they start dishing
i don't think there is anything wrong with wanting to enhance your appearance, or wearing make up. i don't feel like less of a person when i don't have my brows, but i do feel more pulll-together when they are present and accounted for!
I'd need a 'wear makeup everyday' week to work on my makeup issues, since I almost never wear makeup. But I liked the idea of the 'no makeup' week, even if one didn't participate, everyone should examine why one does, or doesn't, do something (makeup, heels, watch so much TV, read so many blogs…) every so often. Keeps us honest.
BTW, you look wonderful with and without makeup.
I like the way you put it–I prefer myself with makeup.
Whenever we go on vacation, it seems I don't wear makeup. Especially if it is a very warm/beachy location. I wear only a little on weekends as well.
But going to work without makeup?! Shudder.
I learned about makeup at an early age because I participated in live theater. So I learned a bunch of tricks and tips on application, which I use to this day.
Or at least, that's what I tell myself.
I use an obscene amount of different makeup, and when I tell people what I use, they are surprised. (Foundation, concealer, powder, eye shadows, eyeliner, mascara, blush, eyebrow gel, lipstick) I gather that means I'm using the products "artfully".
I'm okay with my makeup usage, and weekend non-usage.
I'm a tried and true make-up gal, have been ever since my mom let me play with hers when I was 8 years old (I wasn't allowed to wear it until I was 13).
However, I spend most of my weekends bare-faced and wash off all my make-up as soon as I get home from work. Most of my friends have seen me bare-faced.
Although I wouldn't go without make-up for work (I wouldn't feel dressed or polished, and that's important to me), I would certainly go for lunch or go shopping without anything more than lip balm (and possibly some cover-up on a zit!).
I think this is a great reminder to us: we are more than just our appearance! Thanks for a great article, Sal. Have a lovely weekend, you bare-faced beauty.
I made a huge step recently. We had a friend over, and he and Nathan were waiting for me to shower and get dressed, and as I stepped out of the shower, I wanted to go and great him and was lamenting how long it was going to be before I could, because I needed to put "my face: on first. And so I just didnt. I put on my robe instead. I am still going to wear my makeup out, but it's nice to know dont HAVE to.
Freckles!
That is all.
Have a good weekend, makeup or no!
xoxox evh
One of my close friends in high school, who wore (an appropriate amount of) makeup regularly, made a habit even at that age of occasionally going a day without, because she didn't want to ever feel like she *had* to be made up in order to look "right" to herself. That impressed me, even though I rarely wore makeup at the time.
Makeup is a preference of mine but thats mostly because if I dont use some kind of foundation people ask me if Im ill lol I have that translucent grey/white skin with the big circles. It makes me look like i have the flu unless I wear some powder foundation to give me a healthy color. So yay for makeup from me!
My mom is one of those ladies who cant walk to the mailbox without full makeup. I just don't understand that though.
Even peoples in the caves adorned their bodies or faces somehow. In that sense make up runs in human DNA.Personally, I do little rouge on my cheeks.This ritual translates in my brain as I'm ready to go to work and deal with the world.
I'm a person who likes to wear makeup. While I have no problem leaving the house with no makeup, I enjoy makeup and prefer wearing it over having a bare face.
I tend to think of makeup as just another part of my personal style, and I don't necessarily think that liking makeup needs to be justified to others in order to prove that I am comfortable with myself.
Thanks for this post, it is a confidence booster
I am a makeup minimalist, but I don't like going out of the house without some under-eye concealer.
That being said, I think everybody has seen me with and without makeup. The main reason I put any makeup on? To feel "polished" and to make those baby blues of mine POP!
I think it's great that this no-makeup week has inspired you to think about *why* we wear makeup.
i think you look gorgeous without makeup! a makeup-less face is often fresher-looking, i think. but i'm with you that makeup helps make me look a little more polished; hence, i'm unlikely to head to a meeting or teaching without at least a little.
Well said!
Yours is one of my favorite pictures from the whole project
I'm only just getting to a point in my life when I feel comfortable leaving the house without makeup on. Even so, I will only do so when I am just headed over to my fiancé's apartment, and nowhere else. He has seen my 'naked face', and I am okay with letting him continue to see it, sometimes. The rest of the world, however, does not get this privilege.
Partly I think this is because I have had pretty terrible acne since I was a young teen. At the age of 25, my face is finally calming down a little bit, at least enough so that I can let my fiancé and my family see me without makeup. But I wasn't even allowed to wear makeup until I was 16 or so, and I think the lack of ability to try and conceal my flawed complexion ultimately lead to my NEED to conceal it.
I do enjoy my makeup, as well. I have tons of eyeshadows and things that are pretty, but I totally don't need. I view it as another outlet for creativity, another way to let my personality and flair show outwardly (along with my clothes).
Someday I hope to be confident enough in myself to be able to go to dinner, to work, to the mall without needing to apply foundation, concealer, powder. Until then, I'll keep taking baby steps.
Three words: You Go Girl!
This is such a fashion cliche, but I feel that you should wear the makeup rather than letting the makeup wear you. It should be a pleasure and an enhancement – and, sometimes, maybe even war paint or a mask – but it shouldn't be a necessity. Do some events call for makeup more than others? Absolutely – just as some events call for dressier or more casual clothes. I'd start to get worried if I didn't feel like myself without makeup, though.
I love this post. You have given me so much to think about. When I originally saw the No Makeup Week, I figured it was designed to inspire guilt in those women who use cosmetics on daily basis and make those who don't feel superior. As if it's something wrong to like makeup and it's virtuous to go without it. But now I see nothing couldn't be further from the truth.
I adore this post, Sal. So well said. I've gotten more and more cosmetics dependent recently – it's just something that became routine and somewhere along the way, I stopped thinking about it. So I appreciate this post because it challenges me in a great way.
I hardly ever wear makeup, although I do like mascara and occasionally some lip color. Mostly I am just lazy, but I also just can't bear the feeling of having foundation on my face. I also find makeup removal at night to be an absolute bear. I am happy with the way I look without makeup and have never really considered wearing it on an everyday basis. I do have decent skin though, and if I didn't I would probably reconsider.
Okay, I admit it – I'm addicted to my war paint, and I have ever since I was a little gothling. My little morning ritual feels soothing, and puts me in a good mood to start the day, just like my morning coffee. Besides, I prefer the way I look with makeup, even though I've been told I look 'better' and 'younger' without (that's part of it – I look about nineteen without makeup. I hated the way I looked at nineteen.)
And what is it with men and makeup? We keep being told, and believing, that you have to put on makeup (and wear heels, and on and on) in order to please men, but that hasn't been my experience – the men in my life have tended to be rather critical of it, going as far as to tell me what I can and cannot put on MY face. Which has only hardened my resolve to play with my powders and paints to my heart's content
I would be bothered if a woman was afraid of ever being seen without a bra or other shapewear, as in "Oh no, I can't let my husband see how my breasts actually look" or "I shouldn't inflict my fat rolls on the world." I think natural/everyday makeup (whatever that means to you) is similar–if you want to wear it, if it makes you feel good, that's fine, but it's over the line if you think there's something "bad" or "not good enough" about your own face.
*Exceptions made for pimples, eczema, and other acute or chronic skin conditions, which you certainly shouldn't have to think of as "your own face".
I'm taking the challenge too! Thanks for inspiring me.
I don't wear much make-up and often prefer the look of no make-up in the summer! I'd rather wear none and just look a bit plain than walk around all day worrying that my face is melting off, but that's just me!
I'm one of those people who needs a Makeup Week, to encourage me to try it. I feel weird when I DO wear makeup.
You look beautiful without makeup, but you are gorgeous when you wear it, too.
I have been wearing less and less makeup lately. I'm not sure if it's because I'm going through a minimal makeup phase, which are cyclical for me, or if it's because I'm becoming socialized because of my academic environment.
You look gorgeous, Sally! What an interesting project. There are plenty of times when I go without makeup, like when I go to the gym or out on a quick trip to the market. But I would feel quite naked going to the office or on a night out without makeup.
I'm quite self-conscious about my under eye circles so I love hiding those. But I also love playing with makeup. It's a wonderful opportunity to be creative.
And I love that my husband loves how I look with or without it, that he appreciates my natural beauty and notices when I really take the time to "do myself up."
xoxox
I actually rarely wear make up. Mostly out of laziness. I'm such a no-fuss woman, sometimes I can't even be bothered to brush my own hair. Eep.
I like that foundation with smooth the heredity-based dark circles under my eyes, but that's really the only reason I would wear make-up on a daily basis. However, when I want to dress up for a special occasion, I like to have a full face.
Yes, I need a Makeup Week, too. I went through that Makeupalley phase of needing to own every lipstick, eyeshadow and skin cream there is, but I've come around full circle and rarely wear any makeup anymore. I love my bare face the way it is, and after years of sunscreen I still get compliments on my skin. I'll never wear a full face of foundation, but I do like how a little eyeliner and lipstick define my features and brighten my face.
I can go makeup free for a week – as long as I can wear lipstick. I will not be seen without it! And really, I don't see the need for makeup free week. If I don't want to do something I ain't gonna do it – enter: greasy hair week. Now that's something I could get with.
You're fresh faced and lovely.
I find that the less frequently I wear makeup, the better my skin is, and the more impact makeup has when I do wear it.
You look beautiful!
I'm a makeup loving gal, but just about all of my friends have seen me without it.
You look gorgeous, by the way, both ways!
Regardless of whether you have makeup on or not, how great is it to be told you look especially beautiful? I know you know this already Sal, but your hubby ROCKS.
I actually really enjoy the whole morning ritual, which includes putting on makeup. I'm perfectly fine with going bare-faced on the weekends, but it's hard for me to get up early on weekdays for work, and going through my morning routine helps me feel awake and ready for the day. But I also like the look and feel of my skin without makeup on it, and it's nice to be able to rub my eyes without fearing I'll end up looking like Alice Cooper.
A friend of mind told me about no-makeup March (in the spirit of no-shave November), and I decided to do it. I went an entire month without makeup, and although I don't feel like I ever NEEDED makeup, I am definitely a girlie girl, who LOVES wearing it. And let's face it, I don't have perfect skin.
At first, I felt as though it wouldn't be a big deal. NO ONE commented for the first two weeks, and I was okay, even with the occasional breakout. I was okay, until I went to a mother-daughter brunch for prospective students. I felt so drastically underdressed, simply because I wasn't wearing makeup.
I was so close to cracking, but I stayed strong. I went an entire month, and I'm so glad I did! Now, if I wake up late, and can't wear makeup to class, it really isn't a huge deal. I wear makeup now because I want to, not because I have to.
I think everyone should try to go at least a week without it. It is a healthy experience!
hi sally,
i know this is an old post and i am only commenting now, but i love your blog and have been going through all of it. i think you look great without make up and i don’t see any of the supposed skin problems you claim to have.
the thing is i have those problems. a lot. or at least i did. i’m on accutane now and pretty clear, but i still have these terrible red marks all over my face. i don’t feel comfortable going out without at least some concealer. and before the accutane i needed more than that even. i don’t wear anything else usually, unless i am going out, but i do feel like i NEED concealer.
all the people talking about “no make up week” and that you shouldn’t feel like you “need” make up usually have good skin. or at least not BAD skin, or not skin recovering from being bad. to me, i feel like the acne is the thing changing how i look, like it gets in the way of who i really am. and the make up just makes me look normal and like myself again. i don’t think anyone looks bad without mascara or lip gloss or blush. but i do think some people look bad without any skin make up.
i really don’t like having to put it on every day. i hate it and never thought i’d be one of those people who felt they needed it. i like how the rest of my face looks perfectly fine without anything. but my skin has looked atrocious on occasion without it and now that it doesn’t i still have these awful looking marks. i feel like most people put on make up to look “good”. i put on make up to simply look “not terrible” or “normal”. but i do feel like i have to.
so i was wondering, do you think it’s silly or unhealthy or bad to feel you “need” make up when you have skin problems? if you will be perfectly fine with and actually relieved about not wearing it as soon as it clears up?
Kristine, generally, I feel that you should do and wear what makes you feel most comfortable and powerful. If wearing cover up helps you feel good, there is NOTHING wrong with that AT ALL. This was mostly just a theoretical experiment, and not meant to convince anyone that wearing makeup is bad or wrong! If you stopped wearing the concealers, you might eventually feel less self-conscious about the marks. But doing so is your choice. Entirely. And either way, you’re right because the choice is about YOU!
Thank you. I guess I just feel bad about it cause I hate the idea that I feel like I need it. But for the moment I guess I do. Hopefully that changes in the future.