Confession time: I’m a gigantic prude. All right, maybe “prude” isn’t the right word. Let me put it to you this way: I enjoy a tantalizing movie sex scene as much as the next girl, but I’m not a big fan of talking dirty, I tense up a bit from all the nakiditity in the gym locker room, and I just don’t get porn.
I also dress relatively demurely. I would much rather be swathed in figure-flattering but flesh-obscuring duds than showing the world my skin. By the end of the summer I am just DYING for some cool days so that I can cover up my parts with a nice long-sleeved sweater, a scarf, and some boots.
HOWEVER! I love feeling and looking sexy as much as you daring dressers. I may not be comfortable in a bandage dress or a bikini, but I still want to turn heads. So I’ve figured out how to keep it hot within my own comfort zone. Here are a few simple ways to dress alluringly without sacrificing modesty and comfort.
I adore high heels, but don’t own a single pair of stilettos. I can’t walk in them, for starters, and truly believe that the right chunky heel can convey the same sensuality as a sky-high, skinny one. The trick is to pick a pair that features some other detailing to offset the potential dowd of the thick heel. A pattern like snakeskin or leopard print adds a dash of va-va-voom, or you can try something that evokes the sexy secretary like these spectators:
Both of these pairs feature 3-inch heels, and to get the full, leg-elongating, super-feminine, delightfully sexy effect, I’d recommend a chunky heel that hovers around that height. Anything lower than about 2.5 inches and you the risk of looking downright frumpy.
OK, OK, I’ll admit that this tip is more about physical comfort than modesty. But it’s still an important addition to my sexy-demure arsenal.
Now, speaking of Joan Holloway ….
This look is all the rage now, what with everyone going mad for Mad Men, so why not cash in? I adore the retro sensibility of an outfit like this one, and feel fabulously frisky in it without sacrificing my comfort. Wearing that lacy cami on its own would make me feel exposed, but my angora cardigan provides plenty of coverage while adding texture and sass to the ensemble. A figure-hugging high-waisted skirt and my chunky-heeled spectators, a pile of pearls and some sheer black thigh-highs make me fully, modestly clothed yet still emitting come-hither vibes. I’m ready to take a memo … IN BED.
Regulation fishnets feature loosely woven fibers and lots of exposed leg. Although they come in a multitude of gauges from superloose to slightly tighter, most are fairly revealing … not to mention breezy. But microfishnets include a layer of sheer black nylon beneath fine gauge netting – so you get a subtler texture, more coverage, and darker coloring with all the boudoir appeal of the real deal.
Layering nylons or solid tights beneath regular fishnets can work, too, but I prefer the instant gratification of a twofer. This Hue version rocks, the ones I’m wearing above are from Target (though I’m pretty sure they’re sold out by now), and many other brands offer micro or faux fishnets. Even if you wear them with a fairly conservative outfit, a pair of microfishnets will instantly amp up your sex appeal.
This tank sweater is one of my favorite pieces of clothing, as I mentioned yesterday. I don’t quite know why, but it gives me just a hint of cleavage, and I am deeply grateful for that delicious illusion. But it is also one of the lowest cut garments that I own, making it just barely passable for work wear. One dropped paper clip, and the whole office gets a free glimpse of the girls.
But even when I wear this tank for more casual, social occasions, I often feel a bit naked. So I slap on a giant, eye-catching necklace or necklace pile. The jewelry draws attention to my decolletage, but also creates a barrier between the world and my rack. It becomes equal parts, “Oooooh, boobs!” and “Oooooh, sparkly!” At least, that’s how I see it. Although a silky scarf could work, too, I prefer the necklace route because it shows SOME skin without feeling too revealing.
I wear my miniskirts during the spring and summer all bare-legged, oh yes indeed I do. But lemme tell ya, I fret CONSTANTLY over the possibility of flashing my panties. Come fall, I become positively gleeful that I can finally sport short skirts with modesty-preserving tights. And I do so with absurd frequency until it gets warm again.
These two outfits are decidedly different: The left look is sleek and dressy, while the right look is super casual. But I felt fantastically sexy in both ensembles simply due to leg exposure. Yes, even wearing a sweatshirt and fuzzy vest I felt slinky and sensual solely because the world could see my gorgeous gams. (Inside my tights, that is.)
Obviously this is a look with limited application, but it’s still a good one to keep in your back pocket for those cold days that call for a little self-generated hotness.
I can be a lot more daring when the occasion arises, and do show plenty of skin when the weather gets hot. But my natural coyness drives me to convey my sensuality subtly. These are my mainstays, but I’m always looking for more ways to dress sexy on the sly. Any other suggestions? Let’s hear ’em.
Fishnets and cowboys image by lyrabellacqua.